


Life Unexpected

by mcgarrygirl78



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Alternate Universe, Drama, F/M, Friendship, Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-30
Updated: 2012-08-30
Packaged: 2017-11-13 05:27:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 36,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/499995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcgarrygirl78/pseuds/mcgarrygirl78
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Snark if you must, and you're a great snarker, but I will win you over.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Life Unexpected

**Author's Note:**

> The beginning of this came to me as a lucid dream and I wondered what I could make of it. I love these characters and try to never miss the opportunity for them to tell me a story.

**JUNE 2010**

“Get off me!”

“You're not supposed to walk alone, Mr. Kassmeyer said so.”

“I can walk dammit, get off me.” Erin jerked away from her, almost falling again. “I'm not a damn invalid.”

“Why do you have to make everything so difficult?” Elle said through clenched teeth. This princess was really pushing her limits.

“You don’t even know what difficult is. Just call my damn mother. I want to go home. Now. Now!”

“Fine,” They were in the stables now. “You don’t have to shout; you're gonna scare the damn horses.”

“I’ll shout all day if you don’t call my mother.”

“I'm going to call her.” Elle fought the urge to knock her on her ass. “Just have a seat; I have to go to the office.”

Erin struggled over to the bench and sat down as Elle walked away. She hated her. She hated everything right now and her ass hurt. Stupid fuckin horse; she never liked Fancy. She was bitchy and temperamental and Erin probably had the scars now to show it. She had enough scars…she didn’t need anymore. 

Taking a deep breath, she took her arms out of her forearm crutches and threw them across the stable in frustration. Then she put her head in her hands. _Great, how the fuck am I going to go anywhere now_ , she thought. _You have to get yourself together Erin. You’ve got to stop being so damn angry. You can't cry…you can do anything but fuckin cry_.

David Rossi heard the racket and then saw Elle stalk by the stall he was working in. She was mumbling to herself, something about bitches, princesses, and kicking someone’s ass. Elle had a bit of a temper; he liked that about her. But it was clear that someone had pushed her just a bit too far. 

Putting down his shovel, Dave peeked out of the stall and saw the answer to all of his questions. He’d seen that blonde before. She was a handful, all of the volunteers and employees knew it. The word bitch had been thrown around the stables to describe her. How a 16 year old girl could be so much trouble he had no idea. 

His interaction with her was limited…he wasn’t always at work when she came for her therapy. He had no idea why she had braces on her legs but they didn’t look like a picnic in the park. Not that it was any excuse to treat people like shit. He watched as she put her face in her hands. Maybe she was crying, maybe not, but Dave found himself walking over to check on her.

“Are you alright?” he asked.

“Buzz off.” she said from her behind her hands. There was no point in looking up. She knew it wasn’t Mike Kassmeyer and it wasn’t Sam. She didn’t have time for the other hired help.

“I'm sorry I didn’t hear you.”

“I said buzz off!” she removed her hands, looking at him with venom in her bright blue eyes.

“Whoa, whoa,” Dave lifted his hands. “I come in peace, seriously. I just wanted to make sure you were OK.”

“What do you care?”

“I don’t care, I'm just asking because it’s polite. You know its like when people ask you how you are and you say fine even if your world is falling apart. It’s called etiquette.”

“It’s called stupid.” Erin countered. “If you don’t care then don’t ask.”

“OK, maybe I care a little bit then.”

“Leave me alone, whatever your name is.”

“It’s Dave.”

“OK, when I said whatever your name is I wasn’t looking for an introduction.”

Sighing, Dave turned and walked away. Wow, that one had attitude to spare. He didn’t need some rich bitch giving him the what for; he had enough problems. So he went and grabbed the crutches that helped her walk and leaned them up against the bench where she was sitting.

“You might need these. You know, to defend yourself against the many people you offend on the hourly basis.” He said.

“My mother said I couldn’t use them to hit people.” Erin said.

“You don’t look like the type who listens to what they’re told.”

“You don’t know anything about me.”

“That makes us even. Have a nice day.”

He started to walk away. Erin wanted to call him back, demand he come back, but she had no idea why. She could care less about that stable boy. Why was he bothering her anyway? She watched him go back into his stall and finish shoveling shit or whatever he was doing. Her mother needed to hurry up and get there…Erin just wanted to go home. She needed some Motrin for her legs, her back, and her head. 

“Hey, are you alright?” Sam came walking over to the bench where she sat.

“I swear to God the next person who asks me that is going to get beat over the head with one of these crutches.”

“We've talked about your violent tendencies.” He smiled as he sat down. “You're too pretty for jail, remember?”

“How come I don’t want to kick your ass when you say sort of condescending things?” Erin asked.

“I don't know.” Sam shrugged. “Those were your words not mine though so you were basically condescending yourself. What happened between you and Elle?”

“Who's Elle?”

“OK, the least you can do before offending people and possibly hurting their feelings is learn their names.”

“Fancy threw me off, Sam.”

“I heard…she’s temperamental. I’ll make sure you don’t ride her anymore. This is supposed to be good for you, not upset you or make you scared.”

“I'm not scared of anything.” Erin said. “I'm going to break that horse.”

“She's already broken. She just doesn’t like you. It’s not that big of a deal.”

“She can join the club.”

“You don’t respect her.” Sam said.

“She's a horse Sam, not the Queen of England.” She gave him a skeptical look.

“And you think that because she's an animal you don’t have to respect her? She gave you just what you deserved then, knocking you on your ass.”

“You're being mean to me.” Erin crossed her arms.

“Don’t give me the wounded flower routine; I've known you all of your life remember.”

Erin stuck out her tongue but it just made Sam laugh. He gave one of her blonde plaits a friendly pull and almost got a smile out of her.

“Elle called your mom. She's gonna be here as soon as she can but you might be hanging out for a while. You wanna come in the office or sit out here?”

“I’ll stay out here. Horse manure smells awful but the warmth feels good. Can I have a Diet Coke?”

“We've only got the sugary sodas here.” Sam replied grinning. “Is regular Coke OK?”

“Yeah, I guess.” Erin nodded. “Thanks Sam.”

“No problem.” He stood from the bench. “Hang tight OK?”

He walked away just as Elle was coming in his direction. Her face had gone from explosive back to neutral so that was a good thing. She had a temper…she wasn’t the first girl Sam met like that. Elle was good people but if you pressed the wrong buttons you could be on the other side of an ass whooping. She and Erin Strauss were the same in that respect, which is why they always butted heads.

“She’ll survive.” He lowered his voice to whisper.

“Oh damn, I guess that means she’ll be back Friday.”

“Be nice Elle; she’s been through a lot.”

“So have we all Sam. You wanna know the difference between Princess Erin and the rest of us? At night she gets to contemplate all of her troubles under a canopy on the Upper West Side.”

“Money can’t buy happiness.” Sam said.

“Fine, but a lot of us would at least like to test the theory.” Elle said.

“The love of money is the root of all evil.”

“Oh God, Kassmeyer.” Elle rolled her eyes. “Go away; go away, I hate you.”

“No you don’t.” Sam smiled as he headed to the office and the vending machine to get Erin a Coke.

She poked her head into the stall Dave was still working in.

“Hey cowboy, tell me there's someplace we can go drinking tonight.” 

“I think I've been in enough trouble in my life.” Dave replied. “I'm not adding corrupting the morals of a minor to my colorful repertoire.”

“I’ll make it worth your while.” She smiled. “I'm sure I know what you like.”

“Oh and you want to put me in jail for third degree sexual battery. No thank you.”

“I'm not a kid; I’ll be 18 in September.”

“OK, then I’ll get you drunk and fuck you in September.”

“You're an asshole.” She didn’t want to smile but did.

“It’s a gift.” Dave smiled too. “Is the kid alright?”

“What kid?”

“The blonde girl with the leg braces?”

“Oh fuck that kid. She’s a demon from Central Park West who wants to give the whole world her ass to kiss cuz she's got braces on her legs. Think Cousin Clara from Heidi without the sunny disposition. If we were in Brooklyn right now she’d be digging my boot out of her ass.”

“Was she born like that?” Dave asked.

“I heard she was in some car accident or something; shattered both her femurs. Who cares, Rossi?”

“I was just making conversation.” He finished up his work.

“I have so many more things we can talk about than that little monster. In fact, we don’t have to talk at all.”

“Elle…”

“If you want to know about Strauss, ask Sam. They’re cousins or some junk. I’ll come back when you're feeling friendlier toward me.”

“Don’t hurry.” Rossi said under his breath knowing she wouldn’t hear him. 

It wasn’t that he didn’t like Elle. It wasn’t that he hadn’t jerked off a time or two fantasizing about having sex with Elle. But he needed to leave girls like that right where he found them. His life had consisted of too many wrong turns. 

Mucking these stalls, tending to these horses, and helping heal some of the wounded souls who came in here was Dave’s second chance. Actually, it was his ninth chance. The last thing he needed was to let a piece of ass mess it up. Sure Elle was decent enough, probably, in the grand scheme of things. But how many times could someone be forgiven for making the same mistake?

Dave walked out of Coastal Wind’s stall as Sam walked back with the can of Coke. Someone called him back to the office, there was a phone call, so he grabbed Dave.

“Can you take this soda to Erin please?” he asked. “She's sitting…where did she go?”

“I didn’t see her leave.” Dave replied.

“OK, well if you don’t mind can you find her and give her that? I have to take this call.”

“Sure Sam, no problem.”

“Thanks.”

He smiled again and headed back to the office. Sam was always smiling; he was that kind of guy. Dave didn’t know how happy he’d be if he had to spend his whole life dealing with horse shit, literally and figuratively. Sam’s dad, Mike Kassmeyer, had owned these stables for almost two decades. He grew up surrounded by a bunch of rich pricks that had no problem treating him and his brother Sean like the hired help. 

Yet Sam was a good kid with a good head on his shoulders. He rarely drank, didn’t smoke, or do all the other stuff kids his age were supposed to do. He was 19, like Dave, and a sophomore at Boston University on scholarship unlike Dave. Still, it was hard to dislike Sam. He was good people as Dave’s dad would say. He never once judged Dave and was always nice to him. Sam was always nice to everyone, including Strauss who may or may not be his cousin.

Dave put his bucket, shovel, and broom down in the corner and went on a hunt for the teenage girl. She couldn’t have gotten far with the leg braces and the metal arm crutch thingies. Soon enough he found her out by the pit, that’s where they would walk and exercise the horses not being ridden at any given time. She was leaning and watching Bill Hightower walk with Anastasia, a Black Arabian. Bill was one of the only people that she was always nice to. He lost a leg in Afghanistan seven years before. He started with horse therapy for his anger and stayed for a job.

“Sam said to give this to you.” Dave handed her the Coke.

“Thank you.” Erin popped the top and put the straw in. “Whose horse is that?” she asked.

“I don't know but she's beautiful. After a while all the rich equestrian kids start to blend together.”

“That’s not a very nice thing to say.”

“I'm not a very nice guy.” He replied.

“You cared if I was OK earlier.” She said.

“No, I didn’t care remember?”

“Oh right.” Erin nodded and went back to looking at the horse. “I could’ve been an equestrian. I could’ve been a ballerina or a concert virtuoso. I could’ve been anything I wanted.”

“You gonna let those metal things stop you?” Dave asked.

“Actually I hate horses so that’s what stopped me. They’re surely beautiful but too temperamental for my taste.”

“The same could be said about women.”

“Yes, by a chauvinist pig.” She replied.

“OK, so I'm a chauvinist pig. What are you for being a horse hater?”

Erin rolled her eyes, turning back to look at Anastasia as she drank her Coke. Then she looked at the boy again. 

“Don’t you have some work to do…or something.”

“I am allowed a break. This country has labor laws.”

“Fifteen minutes for every four hours you work.” Erin said.

“Who are you, Lenin?”

“My father is a political scientist…I know all about unions.”

“Ahh so you read. You live your life on paper.”

“You don’t know anything about my life. You're an asshole.”

“Tell me about it.”

Erin made a clicking noise with her tongue. “I'm not telling you anything. You know what, I’ll tell you this. If that’s what you use to pick up girls you either date a lot of idiots or have some lonely Saturday nights.”

“Your sunny ass disposition surely can't have the Upper West Side boys knocking down your door either.”

“I have a boyfriend, thank you very much.”

“Lucky fellow.” Dave smirked.

“As a matter of fact he is.” She turned back to the pit. “Go away.”

“As you wish.” He actually curtsied, which she didn’t see because her back was to him, and walked away.

000

“Are you alright?” Joanna Strauss jumped out of her Beamer and started running toward her daughter who was still hanging out by the pit. “Oh my God, Erin, are you alright?”

“Mum, calm down, I didn’t break anything. It’s all broken anyway.”

“But the phone call…the girl said you fell. She said you fell and wanted to come home.”

“I did.” Erin nodded. “That damn horse knocked me right on my ass.”

“Language, Erin Strauss.” Her mother admonished.

“I think I deserve to say ass after being thrown from a horse, Mum. Have you ever been thrown from a horse?”

“Yes, and I know it hurts sweetheart.” She put her hand on top of Erin’s head. “Are you sure you’re OK?”

“I just wanna go home.” Erin sighed. “It’s been a long afternoon.”

Sam came out of the stable and walked over to his aunt. Oh lord, she was giving him the look as if he pushed the girl himself.

“She's going to be fine, Aunt Joanna. Everything is OK.”

“Who was watching her? How could they let something like this happen? Where is your father?”

“Dad's in the city handling some business. No one let this happen. Erin took a spill, it happens all the time. She’s going to be fine.”

“Who was watching her, Sam?”

“I'm not a baby and I don’t need a babysitter.” Erin said over her mother’s tirade. “No one knocked me off the horse, even if they wanted to.”

“You're not helping, Erin.” Sam said through clenched teeth.

“Go and get in the car, sweetheart. Take your time because we don’t know just how hurt you are. I'm taking you to the doctor.”

“Are you serious?” the teenager couldn’t hold back her sigh.

“We need to make sure you're alright.” She turned back to Sam. “Who was with her today?”

“Elle Greenaway.” Sam replied, regretting it but knowing he had no choice.

“You keep that Elle Greenaway person away from my daughter. Your father will be hearing about this when he gets back and she’ll be lucky to have a job. My daughter is disabled.”

“She is not disabled!” Sam exclaimed. Then he checked his tone. “She’s just injured right now. Elle was doing her job as well as she always does, Aunt Joanna. It’s not her fault that Erin fell.”

“I don’t want her anywhere near Erin from now on. Are we clear, Sam?”

“Crystal clear.” He nodded.

Joanna walked away; just as mad as Elle surely was after the whole thing happened. She wasn’t a bad person; he’d actually always liked his aunt. But six months ago after Erin’s accident she changed. He knew Erin was their only child. He had no idea what it must have felt like to know they could’ve lost her because some idiot decided to get into his car after drinking too damn much. 

Then the doctors thought they might save her but not her legs. It had been a long road to recovery that Erin would be going down for at least the next year or more. Joanna was tired and scared and angry. She had no real outlet for those feelings. 

Sam sympathized with that but he wasn’t going to let her take it out on him, his dad, or Elle Greenaway. He looked at his cousin, sitting in the passenger seat of the car. She looked unhappy. Erin looked unhappy a lot and it started way before her accident. He held up his hand to wave, Erin opened the window and poked her blonde head out.

“Same time next week cousin?” She asked.

“I want you back here on Friday.” Sam said. “You're getting back on a horse.”

“If the doc clears me I’ll be here. Bye Sam.”

“See ya.” He held his hand up to wave. His aunt kicked up plenty of dirt as she backed up and did a U turn onto the road. Sighing, he headed back to the stable where Dave was taking Dash and Lillian out for their wash down. “Hey Dave?”

“Yeah Sam?”

“How would you feel about helping out one of our regulars when she comes for her rides?”

“I've never done that before.” Dave said. “Your dad usually just has me doing the cleaning and stuff. I'm not the world’s greatest people person; I only do slightly better with the animals. I mean is it a kid cuz I'm usually OK with kids if I have to be. For some strange reason they like me.”

“Actually it’s my pain in the ass cousin. She’s a good kid but…the blonde you met earlier.”

“Oh forget that Kassmeyer. I think I’d rather have Dash here crush my nuts than deal with her for any extended period of time.”

“Good…you're hired.” Sam patted him on the back and walked away.

***

“Come in.” Erin looked up from her book later in the evening when someone knocked on her bedroom door. 

“Hey there.” her father came in wearing a smile. “Mum told me that you had a little accident today.”

“I'm fine Daddy.” She rolled her eyes.

“I hope you didn’t give Mum that little eye roll.” He sat down on the edge of her bed.

“I can neither confirm nor deny that.”

“She just worries Erin.”

“I know…”

“You don’t know.” Erich Strauss shook his head. “We almost lost you; you're our only child. We had to sit for hours and hours and wait to find out if our little girl was dead or alive. Yes, Mum is being overprotective but you're too much like me sometimes.”

“What do you mean?” Erin asked.

“You're a slightly overbearing know-it-all who doesn’t like to ask for help and when you're not feeling your best you can lash out at those trying to help you.”

“You're like that, Daddy?”

“I can neither confirm nor deny.”

When Erin smiled, her father did as well. Then he clucked her under the chin.

“Just cut Mum some slack. She’s going to be a mother hen for a while…her chick is hurt.”

“I'm OK. I fell off the horse but Doc Rawlings said I'm fine and I've got the green light for therapy tomorrow and to go back to the stables on Friday. Call Sam Daddy, he’ll tell you it wasn’t so bad.”

“I already talked to him and going back to the stables on Friday is OK. I also talked to your mother and she begrudgingly agreed. Though we both thought it was a good idea that you get a new helper there from now on.”

“Oh good, I don’t like Elle anyway.” Erin turned up her nose. “She's got such a chip on her shoulder. What?”

“Sometimes people do this thing and other people refer to it as the pot calling the kettle black.” Erich said.

“I do not…!” Erin couldn’t even finish because it was true. 

She did have a chip on her shoulder though it surely wasn’t for the same reason as Elle Greenaway. Erin wanted to be free. She wasn’t free with the braces on her legs. She couldn’t run and she couldn’t fence. She was even too embarrassed to return to school. The second half of her junior year had been conducted from home using Chapin’s curriculum. A decision hadn't been made about senior year yet.

“I probably could’ve been nicer to her.” Erin admitted. “I guess.”

“Just remember that when you're dealing with the next helper, OK?”

“OK.” She managed a smile. “Thanks Daddy.”

“Anytime.” Erich kissed her forehead. “Don’t you have plans or something tonight? Why don’t you and Winsor go somewhere and enjoy yourselves?”

“Daddy, you hate Winsor.”

“Hate is a strong word sweetheart. I don’t like you being cooped up in here all the time. You love being out and doing things.”

“I just…I'm embarrassed about these stupid things on my legs.”

“Why? They’re a symbol of your survival. And as soon as your bones are all healed, the pins fuse and your muscles are strong enough, they’re coming off. Doc Rawlings said it could be by years end with a lot of hard work.”

“Then I’ll go back outside.” Erin said.

“Sweetheart…”

“Don’t worry Daddy, I'm meeting up with my friends for coffee and gossip tomorrow. We’ll be outside the entire time I promise. Winsor’s just been really busy.”

“Since when is he too busy for you? I used to have to pry you two apart with a crowbar.”

 _Since the accident_ , Erin thought but didn’t say. He wasn’t quite holding up his end of the boyfriend bargain that was for sure. But she didn’t know how to call him on it. Things had been so good before she climbed into that stupid school van that afternoon. She’d won another match, smiled through the Olympic talk that filled the gym. 

Erin Strauss was one of the best fencers in the state. She was rising in the national ranks and her life was golden. Someone took it all away from her in an instant. They may have taken away her boyfriend too. She wanted to call Winsor on his behavior, his recent disappearing acts. 

But she was afraid. She was afraid it was over and Erin had no idea where to go from there. She’d lost everything. How could she move past losing everything?

“He’s doing a summer lacrosse clinic and it’s a big deal. Some pretty big schools are looking at him.”

They were looking at her once as well but that was all over now. Erin bit back her sigh and her tears.

“Alright sweetheart.” Erich kissed her forehead again. “You relax with your book. If you wanna come and hang with your mum and I that would be nice too.”

“I’ll think about it, Daddy. I don’t want to turn into some hermit either.”

“Are you feeling alright?”

“There's a little pain, there’s always pain. I'm OK.”

Erich gave her the ‘are you sure’ look and Erin gave him the patented yes smile. She’d been perfecting that smile way before the accident. Not fully satisfied but accepting it, he left her bedroom. Erin looked back down at _The Age of Innocence_ but didn’t want to read anymore. 

She picked up her cell phone and pressed 3. She had no idea where Winsor was tonight. He probably didn’t feel the need to explain it either. But she was his girlfriend and she was going to make him. If he didn’t want to be it was as simple as a few words. After a year together Erin at least deserved that.

***

_She came all the way from America  
She had a blind date with destiny  
And the sound of Te Awamutu  
Had a truly sacred ring  
Now her parents are divorced  
And her friend's committing suicide_

Erin bopped her head and sang along to the sounds of Crowded House as she sat at a table outside of Milo’s Coffee in the Village. Her best friend Karen Steyer came out the door carrying two large cups.

“One chai tea latte for you; one Americano for me.” she smiled as she sat down. “You do realize chai means tea right?”

“I was aware of that.”

“So you're drinking a tea tea.”

“As long as you put the caramel creamer in there I'm not going to complain.” Erin said.

“It’s made as you like it. How long have we known each other?”

“I thought Ursula was coming out with us today.”

“She was able to pick up an extra shift at her bookstore job. I don’t get it,” Karen shook her head. “It’s not like she needs the money or anything.”

“You know Ursula loves books like you love shoes. She was so excited to get this job; the manager gave her a chance. Plus her parents said whatever money she makes she can spend on whatever she likes. I'm sensing a shopping trip in the future.”

“We’re gonna need so many bikinis for the Myrtle Beach trip. Don’t give me that look, Erin?”

“What look?” Erin asked.

“You're going on this trip…we’ve been planning it forever. And Liz will be back from Paris and it’s on.”

“I was supposed to go to Paris too.” Erin could hardly say it without breaking down. The few times she’d cried since all of this happened, it had been in pain. But when it came to having to give up spending most of the summer in Paris with one of her closest friends, Elizabeth Prentiss, Erin cried in agony. She still wasn’t over it.

“I know.” Karen nodded. “But you'll be more healed come August, right?”

“I’ll still have these dumb ass braces on my legs. I feel like fuckin Pollyanna.”

“You're thinking small Strauss. That’s not like you.”

“What do you mean?” Erin asked.

“Well c'mon, we all know you were in a car accident and that sucks. But what do the guys in Myrtle Beach know?” Karen asked. “For all they know you got those injuries competing in the X Games or climbing Mount Kilimanjaro. You could create a whole new persona and be the toast of the beach. Think big, girlfriend. That’s the Erin Strauss I know.”

“Thanks.” She smiled. “I called Winsor twice last night. I left two voicemails and he hasn’t called me back.”

“Maybe he just got wrapped up in a bunch of stuff Erin. There could be plenty of reasons he didn’t get a chance to get back to you.”

“I can think of two…and they're attached to my legs.”

“Oh c'mon,” Karen sighed. “You cannot be serious if you think Winsor would stop loving you because of that. I mean it’s not as if you have to wear them forever or anything.”

“So it'd be OK for him to dump me if I did?”

“No, and you know that’s not what I meant. It is a lot for him to deal with.”

“Him? What about me, Karen? I went from hearing tales of future Olympic glory to hearing the whispers of ‘poor Erin’ as if my life is over. It’s not over. I can't just let it be over.”

“I know that.”

“It would just be nice if the boy I loved was here to support me a little. I know he has stuff going on too but damn, he didn’t even call me or text me back. That’s not like him, even after we argue.”

“Are you worried he's seeing someone else?” Karen asked.

“The thought hadn't crossed my mind until you just…” Erin sighed. She drank her tea and ran her fingers through her blonde hair. “No, he wouldn’t do that to me. Would he do that to me?”

“Winsor has been crazy about you since freshman year.” Karen said. “He did everything in his power to get paired with you at that Culture thingie so he could chat you up. He wouldn’t risk all that.”

“He took Jill Morris on the junior prom.”

“Now that’s not fair; you told him to take someone else.”

“He didn’t have to Karen. He could’ve stayed home with me. It’s called allegiance. It was just the junior prom. Missing it wasn’t going to be the end of the world. I missed it…I survived.”

“Well maybe he didn’t get the reverse psychology memo. He isn’t into Jill at all. Trust me.”

“What do you know?” she asked.

“What do you mean?”

“You're telling me to trust you. I've known you since we were eight. When you say that you know something.”

“I just know that Jill is not even close to being the object of his affection or anything like that. I know that Winsor loves you and maybe it’s gonna take him a while to come around and get his head out of his ass and stop blaming himself…”

“Blaming himself? What is he blaming himself for?”

“He could’ve taken you home that afternoon Erin; you didn’t have to take the shuttle. But he was going off with Eugene and those guys to do stupid guy stuff and he feels guilty about that.”

“Is that what he told you?”

Winsor had never mentioned once anything about guilt. She surely didn’t blame him if that’s what concerned him. She blamed that drunken bastard who barely had a scratch on him. He ended up taking a plea deal and was only going to do 8 to 10 years for vehicular homicide. He had some fancy pants lawyer who was going to say his prescription medication caused the accident. 

How did it cause his breathalyzer test to be off the chart no one knew? But the prosecutors didn’t want to risk any juror sympathizing with him. How could they think that when the driver of her van, a father of three was now dead and she was a student athlete whose legs and life had been shattered. Eight to ten was a fuckin joke. Someone should shatter his legs and let him know what it was like. 

Hell, Erin shouldn’t even be walking. Everything that had happened in her recovery thus far had been a miracle. Her own doctors said so. And there was much more hard work to come. She didn’t want to go through it alone.

“He didn’t tell me anything.” Karen replied. “Winsor and I don’t talk like that.”

“He talks to Mark. Maybe I should…”

“Maybe you should just try calling him again later. But I think since I haven’t seen my best friend in almost a week we shouldn’t bog down the conversation with boy problems.”

“I'm sorry.” Erin covered her face. “Oh God, I don’t want to be that friend. I don’t want to be the ‘my man means more to me than myself’ friend. I actually want to be the ‘dammit did you see the new Chanel sandals that I can't wear and I'm pissed’ friend.”

“They are really cute.” Karen said. “I promised not to get a pair out of devotion to you.”

“I appreciate it.”

“Please tell me you're coming back to Chapin for senior year. It’s not going to be the same without you. We had so many plans…we’ve been waiting four years for this. You're a shoo-in for valedictorian.”

“I haven’t made up my mind yet.” Erin said. “My parents would be happy if I did. Well, I should say my dad would be. He thinks I'm isolating myself and its not good for my recovery.”

“What does it have to do with recovery?” Karen asked. “You're in some kind of therapy almost everyday.”

“He means my psychological recovery. Mum, I think she's afraid if I ever get in a car again and she's not driving that I'm going to die.”

“Please don’t tell her you're taking a New York City cab home.”

“I won't.” Erin laughed.

“And what about you? What do you think about coming back to school?” Karen asked.

“I think I'm taking it day by day. Doc said I could be out of the braces by year’s end if I work my ass off. Maybe I could wait until January.” Erin shook her head. “I just don’t know yet. There are so many things to think about and none of it has to do with colleges, boys, parties, or anything else. I've got these huge decisions to make and I actually don’t want to think about it at all right now.”

“I'm sorry.” Karen’s eyes were downcast.

“Don’t apologize. Ugh, I know you're not saying ‘sorry you're in leg braces’ but whenever I hear I'm sorry these days I just want to scream. I want to scream a lot actually.”

“We need to do something to cheer you up. Its summer…you need to be happy.”

“I'm open to any and all suggestions. I really miss the old me. I don’t know if I’ll ever get to be her again and I didn’t even have a chance to say goodbye.”

***

The charcoal gray Lincoln MKS pulled into the stables. Sam saw it, passing off a bale of hay and waving. He jogged up to the approaching vehicle as it slowed and stopped. 

“Hey Sam!” Erich got out of the car and embraced the young man.

“Hey Uncle Erich.”

They were actually second cousins. Erich and Mike were first cousins who grew up like siblings on the streets of Prospect Heights in Brooklyn. Their children grew up the same way, except by then Erich called the Upper West Side of Manhattan home.

“Do you need any help, Erin?” he asked his daughter as she got out of the passenger side.

“I'm alright, Daddy. Hey Sam.”

“Hey you.”

“So tell me how you are Sam? How's the summer treating you?”

“It’s pretty good; there's a lot of hay.”

“I'm sure.” Erich smiled. “How was school this semester?”

“You didn’t talk to my dad?” Sam asked.

“No,” Erich shook his head and laughed. “And I was surprised about that too. I was waiting for Mike to call, out of breath from having his chest puffed out so far.”

“I hope he's not that bad.” Sam smiled.

“He's just proud of a son who deserves it. Tell me about your grades.”

“I got four A's and a B…made Dean’s List again.”

“That’s wonderful. What was the B in?”

“Intro to Philosophy.” Sam replied. “I learned a lot though, I might pick it up as a minor.”

“I minored in Philosophy.” Erich said. “Just ask me if you want to know anything.”

“I will, thanks.”

“And you're still seeing that lovely young lady? I'm sorry, I've forgotten her name.”

“Its Jessie and yes I am.” Sam nodded. “She's coming by today to take me to lunch. I was actually going to ask if Erin could come with us. I know she’s usually tired after riding but burgers and shakes might be a good boost for the weekend.”

“That’s a great idea; I'm sure she’d love to. I'm going in to talk to your dad.”

“OK.”

Sam found Erin on the same bench she sat on Tuesday afternoon. She had on her riding helmet and was ready to go.

“Jessie and I are going to take you to lunch after your ride today.” He said. “Your dad said it was OK.”

“Sure.” she nodded. “What horse am I riding today? Who’s going to be my helper?

“You’ll be on Summer Breeze. She’s a Latvian, so she's pretty laid back but doesn’t take much guff. I asked Dave to help you out from now on. The same general description applies.”

“Who's Dave?” Erin asked raising an eyebrow. While she could recognize almost everyone who worked or volunteered at the stables, she didn’t know a lot of names.

“You met Dave the other day.” Sam said. “He brought you your Coke.”

Erin opened her mouth to object; she didn’t want to be anywhere near that guy. Then she stopped herself. Her father and her mother both told her she needed to be more cordial with people. Dave’s job couldn’t be that easy, cleaning up horse poop and all. 

Maybe Erin didn’t need to make it worse by pushing his buttons. She would get through the lesson. If she didn’t like him then Sam would surely hear about it. But at least Erin would give him a chance. He would get one chance.

“OK.” She said.

“OK?” Sam asked. “You're not going to complain or be mean?”

“I resent that, Sam Kassmeyer. You better be glad I love you.”

“Dave is good at what he does. You're going to have a great ride.”

Dave walked through the stable with a big brown horse. Erin looked at him as he approached.

“Hi Erin.” his greeting was amiable.

“Hello.”

“She’ll be right out Dave. Bill is out there and he’ll help you set up.”

“Sure.” Dave nodded and kept walking.

“Are you going to be OK?” Sam asked. “I want to go and check on everyone.”

“I'm fine. Thanks Sam.”

He gave her shoulder a gentle pat, got up, and walked further into the busy stables. Erin took a deep breath. She slipped her arms into her crutches and stood. This could go well or this could go bad. 

Erin knew some of that relied on her attitude. Dave was a Cro-Magnon boy but it wasn’t like they needed to be best friends. This was just a riding lesson. It was about 45 minutes of her life. Erin could do this.

She finally made it over to where Dave and Bill were standing. It was called the climbing cliff and she hated it. Stairs were her nemesis right now. She didn’t have any at home; luckily their condo was one floor. But she did them in therapy and sometimes it ended in tears of frustration. There were only four here and she made her way up with Dave on her heels.

“Sam said that I needed to spot you.” he said.

“That doesn’t mean you get to touch me.” Erin replied. “So get your mind out of the gutter.”

“My mind is clean.” Dave shook his head. “Can you walk without the crutches?”

“I can barely stand without the sons of bitches.” Erin gritted her teeth. OK, the steps weren't the hardest part. Mounting the stupid horse could be pure hell. She looked down at Bill and he gave her the thumbs up. “You got me, Bill?”

“I got you, kiddo.”

“Look, how about I help you?” Dave asked. “We’ll do what needs to be done, you can go on hating me, and I’ll secretly curse your name. Does that sound like a plan?”

“I think I can live with that.” she suppressed a grin.

Dave got Erin on the horse with little effort. She was tiny, probably about 5’7” but didn’t weight more than a couple of bags of groceries. At least she didn’t to Dave anyway. She’d probably lost some weight since her injuries but he couldn’t imagine her being much bigger. 

Taking the crutches, Dave walked back down the steps. He took Summer Breeze’s reins and walked her into the pit. Once inside, he climbed on the fence to sit. Erin’s crutches sat beside him.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“Did you expect me to lead you around?” Dave asked. “This isn’t the pony pen at the zoo; you know how to ride. You’ve got your crop, you’ve got a good horse…enjoy yourself. I'm here if you need me.”

She gave him a nasty look but gently kicked the horse. Summer Breeze started to trot. Erin wasn’t overly fond of horses but she did have elementary riding skills. Uncle Mike had been running this stable for her entire life. Summer Breeze definitely had a better disposition than Fancy. Erin wouldn’t care if they made glue out of that mean old horse.

“Pull up some if you want to slow down.” Dave said, making the motion with his hands as he watched the horse’s speed increase.

“I'm OK.”

“Are you preparing for a jump?”

“Shut up, Dave.”

“Yes ma'am.” He nodded.

He grinned and she did too. This might not be so bad if every lesson could be like this. Summer Breeze was definitely a good idea. Dave watched her pull up on the reins and the horse slowed.

“Are you alright?” Dave asked as they came around the circle.

“I'm fine.” Erin waved to her father. “Hi Daddy!”

“You look fantastic, sweetheart.” Erich stood at the fence with Mike. “How do you feel?”

“I feel good.” She smiled.

“Dave is one of our best horse handlers.” Mike told his cousin. “Erin is in very capable hands.”

“How did you get so interested in horses, young man?” Erich asked. 

Looking him up and down, it was clear that Dave was not a member of the equestrian set. No doubt he was one of the strays or lost causes Mike picked up or someone dropped off. Erich would do his best not to look down his nose at him. He saw Mike make miracles out of some of these kids.

“I wouldn’t say I was interested, sir, but it turns out that I am good at it. They’re amazing creatures.”

“Just look after my daughter.” Erich replied. “She's the only one I have.”

“Yes sir.” Dave nodded. “Erin, try a little speed. You can both handle it.”

She nodded and gave the horse a gentle hit with the crop. Summer Breeze responded just as she was supposed to. Her father nodded, talked a little more with Mike, and then headed back to his car. Erin seemed to relax some when he was gone.

“Your dad seems nice.” Dave said. He left out ‘in the Upper West Side rich bastard type way’.

“He's wonderful. I definitely like this horse better than Fancy. Can I ride her all the time? Does she belong to someone?”

“She's one of Mike’s. He’s got four of his own horses here. I think his horses have a better disposition than a lot of the others. Some of them can be temperamental bastards, just like people. If you put your hands together it might make the ride a little smoother. Like this.” Dave showed her how to do it.

“Seriously,” Erin smirked. “You're going to show me how to ride a horse?”

“You got a problem with that?” Dave asked. “If you're so doubtful then just don’t do it. It doesn’t bother me either way, Erin.”

She rolled her eyes but put her hands together like he said. It really did make the ride smoother. Erin had never really enjoyed these rides. Like all of her other therapies, it was a chore. The only highlight was spending extra time with Sam. 

Of all of her cousins, he was definitely her favorite. But for the first time in three months she could say that this was good. It was almost fun. Since none of her other work could ever be described as pleasant, these twice weekly rides might be her only respite.

“OK, bring it in Erin.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means bring the horse to me.” Dave said. He climbed off the gate slowly so as not to spook her. Then he grabbed Erin’s crutches.

“Oh you really are lazy, aren’t you?”

“Pretty much.” he nodded.

She wasn’t going to smile at him. She just brought the horse to him and Dave stroked Summer Breeze’s nose.

“You both did a really good job.” 

“Thanks.” Erin said.

Dave took them back to the climbing cliff, where Bill was waiting to hold the horse.

“Did you have a good ride?” he asked.

“I like her. She’s going to be my partner from now on.”

“Good plan.” Bill smiled. “She's mellow but knows how to have fun.”

“Are you ready?” Dave asked.

“If you grope me Dave I'm kicking your ass.” Erin asked. “There are witnesses.”

“One of these days you're going to shock yourself and say something nice to me.” he pulled her from the horse, held her steady, and slipped her crutches on her arms. “I’ll wait.”

“You better.” now Erin smiled. “You're going to have to spot me from the front walking down.”

Dave nodded, going ahead of her and walking backwards as Erin lumbered down the steps. It looked like it was killing her but she didn’t complain. He thought it might be lucky that she could even walk in the first place. If what Elle told him was true and her legs were shattered…that was no joke. Dave broke his leg playing baseball in his early teens. He remembered being laid up and having to walk with crutches for 10 weeks. What Erin dealt with was a lot more than that.

“Are you alright?” he asked when she was on solid ground again.

“Yeah.” she nodded, wishing she could strike that question from the English language. “I bet you're sorry now that you got stuck with me.”

“Nope.” He shook his head. “I have a plan.”

“What kind of plan?”

“I'm going to make you fall head over heels in love with me. It should fill my summer hours nicely.”

“Oh my God, eww.” Erin had to stop walking because she was laughing so much. “You've got to be kidding me.”

“Yes Erin…I'm kidding you.”

He said it in such a deadpan tone that Erin just looked at him. She really scrutinized him but Dave held up well.

“I can't tell if you're playing with me.” she said.

“Well that makes things really interesting, doesn’t it?”

“You're a jackass if you make a plan to have a girl fall in love with you but don’t plan to reciprocate.”

“My plan, my rules.” Dave replied. “And who said I didn’t plan to reciprocate? Casanova was the greatest lover of all time. He was Italian you know…Italians do it better.”

“No offense but maybe you had a few brushes with the law because you make dumb plans.”

Dave just laughed. He laughed and felt it all the way to his belly. When he looked at Erin her smile was genuine. He could see it in her blue eyes. The kid had jokes and snark so there was hope for her yet. This assignment might turn out to be better than Dash crushing his nuts after all. Maybe.

***

“Does Dave have a last name?” 

“Dave who?” Sam asked sipping his chocolate shake.

They’d gone to Chappaqua Restaurant and Café for lunch after Erin’s ride. She was tired but it had been a while since she completely indulged in what her mother called junk food. Desire overpowered exhaustion this afternoon.

“I'm talking about Dave at the stable.”

“Oh, that Dave. His last name is ‘too old for you so stop looking at him’.”

“Sam!” Erin exclaimed, covering her mouth. 

“You're not funny.” Jessie laughed as she playfully punched his arm.

Erin loved Sam and Jessie. They had been dating since the summer before his senior year of high school. She was one year behind Sam in school but they’d been stuck like glue since the moment they met. Not even the four hours between New York and Boston was any competition for their affection. She wondered how much sex they had and if it was awesome. As much as Erin wanted to ask, she never would. She never asked a soul.

“I have a boyfriend and I am not interested in Dave. I'm only asking his last name. He knows mine and I want reciprocity.”

“It’s Rossi.” Sam replied.

“Does he have a criminal record?” Erin asked.

“That’s not my place to discuss, Erin. If you want to know you should ask him but you're not going to because it’s rude. Also…he's too old for you.”

“How old is too old? You act as if he's 30 or something. He's not 30, is he?”

“He’s nineteen like I am.”

“Oh that’s not fair. You're turning 20 on Christmas Eve and Jessie just turned 17. It’s pretty much the same deal. Not that I'm interested in David Rossi. Nothing could be further from the truth.” Erin shook her head and ate her fries. “I'm just looking to bust his balls.”

“Why?” Jessie asked.

“I'm doing it for fun. He started it.”

“So you had a good ride today?” Sam asked.

“I really did.” She nodded. “I like Summer Breeze; she fits my personality well. I can admit I wasn’t at all enthusiastic about horse therapy when Uncle Mike brought it up to my parents. I feel like my whole life has just become a litany of therapy sessions. Then after my encounter with Fancy I was ready to throw in the towel. Now I might give this another shot.”

“I'm glad.” Sam smiled. “You're doing really, really well Erin. I know you probably hear that all the time and it might piss you off but it’s true. You’re not letting this beat you.”

“I won't tell you how many times I wanted to. When I was confined to the wheelchair it was a special kind of agony. But if I don’t fight I’ll never fence again.”

“What did your doctor say about fencing?” Jessie asked.

“The doctors say anything is possible. It’s going to take time and much more therapy to get that kind of mobility back but I'm young. I'm young, active, and I want to fight for it. I can't give up without trying. I definitely won't be eligible for senior year competition but college is possible. The Olympics are still possible.”

“I have faith in you.” Sam put his hand over hers on the table. “I’ll always have faith in you.”

“I need all the faith I can get right now so I thank you for that.”

***

“You're mad at me, I know it.” 

“I’d rather just forget about it actually.”

“I know that tone…you're definitely mad at me.”

“Winsor, please just stop.” Erin sighed and held back the tears of frustration. She left him two messages on Tuesday night and he was just getting back to her on Friday. Worse of all he was trying to get sympathy from her for it. Erin wasn’t in the mood to be sympathetic. He hadn't even asked how she was or what made her call twice.

“Are you alright?” he asked.

“Just tell me what had you so busy.”

“I've been doing the clinic.” Winsor replied. “There have been some great scouts showing up and coach has been working us hard. We want the championship this year. After coming so close last year, having people choke in the clutch…its now or never.”

“Yeah.” Erin nodded.

“Did you have therapy today?”

“I have therapy everyday.”

“C'mon babe, don’t be mad at me OK? I know I messed up but I'm gonna make it up to you. I’ll bring over _Across the Universe_ and that cheese popcorn that you love so much.”

“I actually love the movie theater butter kind better.”

“What? You never let me get butter on our popcorn when we go to the movies.” He said.

“That stuff is animal fat, Winsor, not real butter. It’s so disgusting.”

“OK fine, its _Across the Universe_ and as much real butter as you can stand. Does that sound good? Do you have therapy tomorrow?”

“I usually do but there's rain in the forecast for the entire weekend. I've been tired and sore. Doc Rawlings agreed that I could take both days off and rest.”

“Well that’s perfect. I’ll come over and give you all the attention that you deserve.”

“OK.”

“You still don’t sound happy.” Winsor said.

“I'm just tired.” Erin lied. She wasn’t happy but she couldn’t form the words to say it. Winsor used to make her happy. What the hell was wrong with her? “I’ll be happy to see you tomorrow.”

“Will your parents be around?” 

“I'm not sure but they don’t mind when you come over. I need to take this medicine and try to get some sleep now so I need to go.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow babe; I love you.”

“Me too. Goodnight.”

Erin’s stomach churned as she hung up the phone. She was being silly, Winsor was really busy. He was always busy and she used to be busy too. She used to be happy, busy, and her stomach rarely churned. Everything was different now. Erin didn’t even know how to live the simplest aspects of her life anymore. Most days she didn’t feel like that girl she was before the accident. 

The truth was that she was no longer that girl. Still there were other things, bits of normalcy, which she wanted to hold onto with both hands. Shaking her head and sighing, Erin took 1000mg of Motrin before the pain came back. There was no better alarm clock in the morning than pain. If she was lucky she might be able to sleep the eight hours while it was coursing through her bloodstream. Sleeping on her back was no picnic but Erin had almost gotten used to it.

“Fuck.” She muttered, slipping down on the bed and throwing one of her pillows over her face. “Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!”

***

“I don’t want to ride today.” Erin said. 

“What's the matter?” Dave asked. “Summer Breeze is ready for you. And you already missed Tuesday.”

“I'm um, I'm sore and stuff. I fell and I just don’t want to do it.”

“When did you fall?”

“Who are you, Mike Wallace now?” she glared at him. “Stop asking me so many questions.”

“OK, I’ll stop asking.” Dave backed off. “If you don’t to ride, what do you want to do?”

“That’s a question, David.”

“You just called me David.”

“That’s your name, isn’t it?”

“It’s on my birth certificate yeah.” he nodded. “No one calls me that except my mom and only when she's pissed. It’s been a while since I heard it. We have to do something though.”

“There's a table and benches over there. Maybe we can sit and…just sit.”

“If you really want to.”

“Well I can't ride today.” Erin said. “I had to double up on therapy on Tuesday since I took off the weekend. I fell, I'm sore, and I'm fuckin tired David.”

“OK.” He put his hand on her shoulder but quickly removed it. “Do you want a Coke or something?”

“Yeah,” she nodded. “Thanks.”

He turned toward the stables as Erin slowly made her way over to the picnic table. No doubt Sam or Uncle Mike would come out when they saw she wasn’t riding. Erin would have to think of something to tell them. She didn’t care; she just didn’t have the strength today. 

She only came out because her mother would be spending the afternoon home trying to make deadline. Erin didn’t want to be there under her watchful eye either. It was so damn hot today; she felt weak and defeated. She hated that feeling more than almost anything in the world. For all the physical pain her injuries put her through, it had nothing on this.

Winsor came over on Saturday afternoon to watch _Across the Universe_ and have popcorn. He was all over her before the story barely began.

“ _I thought we were watching the movie.” She laughed some, trying to keep his octopus arms at bay._

_“I just miss you so much Erin. It’s been so long and I miss you.”_

_“Miss me? I'm right here.”_

_“But I love you so much.” he started moving over her on the bed. Her leg braces were heavy and it made it hard for her to move. “You always tell me you love me. Don’t you love me?”_

_“I…” Erin couldn’t make herself say the rest of the sentence. She didn’t even know what was about to come out of her mouth so she clamped down on her lip. “What does that have to do with sex?”_

_“You always say it likes it’s a dirty word, babe. We would be making love Erin…we love each other. You’re not gonna get knocked up.”_

_She was trying to grab his hands as he grabbed her._

_“We don’t have to fight. You don’t have to fight me.” he took hold of her wrists._

_“Don’t do that. Ow, stop it dammit. Winsor, stop…”_

_He kissed away her protests, trying to keep hold of her wrists as he wriggled her legs apart. Erin struggled, and finally got free enough to grab her crutch from beside the bed where it rested._

_“Ow!” he jumped when she hit him across the back. “Dammit, Erin, what the hell are you doing?”_

_“Get out!” shaken, she managed to get up from the bed probably quicker than she’d ever done since the accident. Erin was surprised she didn’t hit the floor as soon as her feet landed on the carpet. Her legs were jelly, her heart racing, and she could barely breathe. “I said stop and it means stop.”_

_“I wasn’t going to do anything you didn’t want me to.”_

_“You already were asshole! Get out!”_

_“You hit me with a fuckin crutch.” He rubbed his back. “What the hell is the matter with you? You hit me with a fuckin crutch, Erin!”_

_“You're lucky I didn’t split your skull open. We are so through…so through. I'm done with this.”_

_“We’re through? Nice, after I've stood by you through all your crap. Erin I will have you know that there are plenty of able-bodied girls who want me, OK? But I'm trying to be a good boyfriend to you.”_

_Those words hit her like a bullet but Erin held onto her composure. The tears came, she hated them for it, but they came anyway._

_“I'm going to be able-bodied, as you so lovingly called it, again one day Winsor. You're always going to be a douche. Get out of my house.”_

_“Fine.” He grabbed his bag and turned to go out of her bedroom. “Maybe you can call me when you're done PMS'ing or something. Damn, ever since this accident it’s been like I'm dating some manic depressed chick. I didn’t sign on for that.”_

_Erin was following him, slowly making her way down the hall to make sure that he got out. The words hurt so much but they didn’t surprise her. Winsor wanted her because she was perfect. Even if she really wasn’t, she looked that way. At least she used to. Now Erin was as damaged on the outside as she felt inside sometimes._

_“I guess you should be glad you don’t have to do that anymore. Goodbye.”_

_Winsor didn’t say a word as he left. Erin just slid down the wall and cried her eyes out. Oh dear God, she’d become one of those clichéd teenage girls she and her friends ragged on. Oh the boyfriend drama! She’d almost become a damn statistic in her own bedroom._

_Able-bodied, what the fuck was that even? Really? It had come to this? And who in the hell knew how she was going to get up from the floor._

_She should've beat Winsor to death with the crutch but it surely wasn’t going to help anything. It would've felt really good though. Erin had to find a place for all of the anger inside of her. It was driving her mad._

“Here's your soda.” Dave held out the Coke.

“You scared me.” Erin put her hand on her chest. “Don’t sneak up on me.”

“I'm sorry.” He climbed up on the table but made sure to keep a respectable distance from her. Dave would be much more comfortable with her on a horse and him on a fence. But if this was what she preferred today then he’d do his best to roll with it. Rolling with it was something he was good at. “Can I ask you something personal?”

“How personal are we talking?”

“What happened to your legs?”

“Right before Christmas the school van I was driving in got slammed by a drunk driver. I suffered a lot of injuries but the ones to my legs were the most severe. My left kneecap and femur were shattered and my right femur broke in two places. I also had two hairline fractures but the doctors thought that could’ve been caused by my training.”

“What were you training for?” Dave asked.

“I was a fencer…I am a fencer.”

“Damn.”

“Yeah, pretty much.” Erin nodded.

“And where did you fall recently?”

“I didn’t fall. I don’t like to lie but I didn’t really know what else to say. I knew if I said that then no one would push me. I just didn’t want to ride today. It’s not always easy to explain. I needed a simple answer.”

“OK.”

There wasn’t much to talk about though Dave wondered why she had to lie to him. It wasn’t as if they had to talk at all. But if Erin didn’t want to get on a horse today then she had to make up some excuse. Her parents seemed to be all about her therapy. Of course if his daughter had shattered her legs he’d probably be the same. It looked as if she came from money…he heard Elle say she lived on the Upper West Side. 

She’d surely prefer to spend her summer sunning, shopping, and sipping some overpriced coffee somewhere like a teenage version of Carrie Bradshaw or something. Yet she was stuck here smelling horse manure and having to deal with him. He might be quiet and bitter about the whole thing too. Dave liked her snark though. He didn’t like her, but he liked her snark. Yeah that was it; he just liked her snark.

“I kicked my boyfriend out of my house.” She finally said.

“I thought you lived with your parents.”

Erin looked at him. She wanted to say something but he was wearing this whimsical look on his face. He knew he’d said something funny and was waiting for her reaction. She thumped his arm; Dave feigned pain.

“His name is Winsor.”

“Oh my God, stop.” Now he laughed. “Are you serious? His name is Winsor?”

“What's wrong with that?” she asked.

“Nothing, if you're the bare-chested rakish hero of a Harlequin romance.”

Erin laughed. She covered her mouth to keep Coke from spewing everywhere. Then she coughed a little.

“He's actually the second guy I've known in my life named Winsor.”

“Hmm, must be an Upper West Side thing.” Dave said.

“Well, the other Winsor, not my boyfriend, lived on the Upper East Side.”

“OK, it must be an Upper something Side thing.” He smirked. “Why did you kick out your boyfriend?”

“He didn’t stop when I asked him to.”

“Erin did he…?” Dave’s face turned serious.

“No.” she shook her head. “I want to say that he would never do anything like that but we don’t always know people even when we think we do. I banged him over the back with my crutch.”

“That’s my girl.” He put his hand on her shoulder again.

“I am so not your girl, David Rossi.”

“But my plan is still in motion.”

“Ahh right, making me fall in love with you.” Erin nodded. “How's that going by the way? You don’t quite look like the type but I imagine that you have pie charts and journal entries all about it.”

“Snark if you must, and you're a great snarker, but I will win you over.”

“And then what?” she asked.

“I’ll give you the ride of your life, Erin Strauss.”

She didn’t want to smile but she did. She kept glancing at him but Dave was looking straight ahead. He was drinking Coke too, looking as if he was enjoying the hot day. Erin wondered what he really thought in his head and if he was indeed serious about making her fall in love with him. 

Of course he wasn’t, he was just whiling away the hours until summer vacation, and surely his sentence at the stables, was up. Well hell, Erin didn’t think she was ever going to enjoy anything again. She could enjoy this. She just had to stay smart.

“I don’t usually like short rides, David Rossi.”

“Ouch.” He put his hand over his lap. “Ouch, ouch, ouch.”

They were both laughing as Sam walked up to the table and benches. He smiled at them.

“Hey you. I expected to see you giving Summer Breeze some good exercise today. Is everything alright?”

“I just had a long week.” Erin replied. “Doc Rawlings gave me the weekend off because of the rain so on Tuesday and Thursday I had to double up on therapy. I really just didn’t think I could do it today.”

“Alright.” Sam nodded. “But you're OK? Forgive me for asking too much but you are my little cousin.”

“I know, and I'm fine.” She smiled. “Dave is regaling me with stories of his awesome adventures doing all kinds of possibly not legal things.”

“That’s not true, Sam.” He gave Erin a look. She stuck out her tongue as if Sam wasn’t even there. “She's adorable when she lies.”

“I'm adorable all the time and you know it.”

“Maybe you two should get your own comedy routine…Rossi and Strauss.”

“Strauss and Rossi.” Erin said.

“Hey, R comes before S.” Dave said.

“But I'm cuter than you.”

“That’s true but it means absolutely nothing.” Dave shook his head.

“That’s not what you told me…”

“Erin…” he covered her mouth. 

She was giggling behind his hand. Dave looked at Sam and Sam was looking at him. _Please don’t let him think I'm trying to get into his little cousin’s pants_ , Dave prayed. If Mike ever suspected he was chasing tail instead of working he could be in deep trouble. This was especially if the tail in question was his underage cousin.

“Erin, at least walk around a little.” Sam said. “You don’t want to stiffen up. It’s a nice day.”

“That sounds like a good plan.” She smiled when Dave’s hands were back in his lap. “Thanks Sam.”

“You got it.” he held his hand up to wave as he walked away. 

“You're gonna get me in trouble.” Dave said through clenched teeth. “If Mike doesn’t trust me I could lose my job.”

“I was just having a little fun with Sam. I didn’t mean to put you in such jeopardy David.” Erin struggled but she got off the table by herself. Then she got her crutches on alone as well. “If you think it’s too hot you can get out of the kitchen…I won't think less of you. Scout’s honor.”

He watched as she slowly started walking away. This girl was something else. One week he’d known her and she really thought she was going to get under his skin. No way…girls didn’t get under his skin. If she wanted to play, he could play all day. It was getting hot alright but young Erin Strauss better watch herself before she got burned.

***

“Distract me.” Erin said as she put the rubber ball between her calves. She was sitting on the edge of a dining room chair with her hands behind her. “I don’t care what you say; you just have to distract me.” 

“Well I've got some big plans.” Ursula Kent sat in another dining room chair. She was twirling some of the reddish brown hair that didn’t make her ponytail around her index finger. “I'm definitely going to be losing my virginity before this summer ends. I've picked Evan Davenport.”

“Do I know him?” Erin gritted as she did the leg lift #4 holding onto the ball. This was one of her daily exercises; it never seemed to get easier. “Is that the manager at the bookstore.”

“Oh yeah. Don’t hate me but I'm pulling a total Lolita on him. No regrets.”

“You're awful.” Erin actually managed to smile but it was difficult. “Keep talking.”

“I'm tired of being a virgin, I'm 17 now, and I actually really like him. He’s a man, not like the silly boys who chase us around like love struck idiots. He can help me out and I can definitely help him out. Then there’s Sarah?”

“You’ve only had a crush on Sarah Danlin since eighth grade.”

“I know, and I'm not a little girl anymore. I'm a C cup, know what I'm saying? Uh uh you're not allowed to give up. That was only eleven.”

“I didn’t know you were counting.” Erin was huffing and puffing.

“I was; it’s my job. Take a little break, its OK, but you're doing 20.”

“You suck.”

“I swallow too, hadn't you heard the rumors?”

Erin laughed, she laughed right through the pain and Ursula pumped her fist in victory. She and Erin Strauss had been friends since the eighth grade. A job promotion moved Ursula’s family from the lush suburb of Devon, PA to New York City. Her parents enrolled her in Chapin and she became Erin and Karen’s third Musketeer. The thing was that Ursula never got along with Karen like she did Erin. 

There was something about the slightly repressed, snarky, smart blonde that she just loved. At first Ursula was afraid she might be sexually attracted to Erin; she’d known forever that she was bisexual. But it wasn’t that. Well, it was a little of that. They didn’t have a ton in common but Erin just adored Ursula for who she was. She loved the bookworm, sex-crazed, witty girl who colored her hair blue one Halloween without realizing it was permanent. 

Ursula was full of life, laughter, and fun. She loved sci-if books and movies; dreamed of one day writing a movie about kickass women in space. She said it would be one part _Star Trek_ , one part _Charlie’s Angels_ , and another part _Galaxy Quest_. Erin would sit and listen for hours as Ursula talked about her dreams. It was the least she could do. 

After her accident, Ursula was always there for her. She brought books and balloons to the hospital. She played stupid, off-key songs on her guitar to make Erin laugh instead of cry. Ursula told her all the cool and uncool stuff happening in school while she was away. 

Erin, Karen, Ursula, and Elizabeth were a foursome and everyone knew it. But Erin felt like she’d lost some of Karen and Elizabeth after her accident. They were all young and surely wanted to live their lives. She tried her best to understand that. But it was even harder to since Ursula was still there for her no matter what.

Her mother ran into the room when she heard the raucous laughter. She looked at the girls.

“Is everything OK?” Joanna Strauss asked.

“Laughter is the best medicine, Mrs. Strauss.” Ursula replied.

“I've heard that before. Are you hungry Ursula?”

“I would love some pizza.” The teen said.

“I was going to make turkey and spinach meatloaf with zucchini chips.”

“Oh yes ma'am, that was totally going to be my second choice.” She smiled.

“I think you do that to me on purpose.” Joanna smiled and left the room.

“I'm kidnapping you and stuffing you with junk food as soon as I can. You need to put on weight anyway kid…you're looking like Kate Moss circa ’95. It’s a good look for some but a little unhealthy on you.”

“Thanks Ursula, I can always depend on you to keep it real.”

“Damn straight. Now I think you have nine more leg lifts. Don’t worry, I’ll distract you with stories of the hot summer sex I haven’t had yet.”

“Let’s talk about Sarah.”

“I'm not gonna harden your straight girl nips with hot lesbian fantasy sex stories, at least not today. Just know that Sarah and I will hook up when the time comes and it will be epic. Now let me tell you all about Evan. He’s so smart and sexy and funny. He’s a widower…c'mon, is that not a Woody Allen character?”

“Is he Jewish?” Erin asked. “I don’t think he’s Jewish.”

“He's not Jewish.” Ursula shook her head. “Not all of Woody’s characters are Jewish. You know this; we've watched enough of his movies. I could be Tracy. Evan isn’t Isaac or Yale though. Eww, I would never want to be with Isaac or Yale.”

“So not true…you’d be with Yale. That’s twenty.”

“Bite your tongue, and that’s 18. I wouldn’t be with Yale. At least I wouldn’t at this time in my life. But I can't deny that I might, at some time before I die, be with a guy like Yale. If we’re still friends though, I want you to kick my ass. Two more, Erin.”

“We’re always going to be friends.” Erin lifted her legs once and then again. She let out the breath she was holding. One of these days she’d get better with the breathing while in pain. “And I broke up with Winsor.”

Ursula had to cover her mouth so she wouldn’t make a strange squealing noise and scare the hell out of Mrs. Strauss. She already suspected that she wasn’t one of Joanna’s favorite people. She didn’t want to freak her out anymore.

“When? I talked to you the day before yesterday. What happened?”

“It was Saturday, and it’s a long story. Maybe it was a long time coming. I don't know.”

“Well I'm not going anywhere. You know I could never turn down your mom’s gracious offer of zucchini chips. Talk to me; I'm listening.”

***

“You’ve been riding around with Dave for a month now.” Sam said. 

“Actually, I do the hard work and he sits on the fence. It’s a life plan of his I think.”

“Erin?” 

“Yeah?” she looked at her older cousin.

“Is there something going on between the two of you?”

“Oh c'mon Sam. He’s mostly a nice jerk and I like that about him. Having someone in my life like that right now, who has witty comebacks for my guff, that’s good for me. But I have a boyfriend, remember?”

“I know you and Winsor broke up.” Sam replied. “And that’s not because I wanted to be first in line for info on my cousin’s love life. It’s because your dad told my dad and I overheard. Is there something going on between you and Dave Rossi?”

“Absolutely not.” Erin shook her head as she said it a little too quickly. “I don’t want him getting in trouble and possibly losing his job for something that just isn’t happening. Its not happening Sam.”

“You seem so adamant.”

“And you seem so sure. We’re just friends, and we’re not even that really.” Erin said. “He helps me at the stables and distracts me for an hour or so from all the BS. There's no crime in that.”

“No.” Sam shook his head. “As I told you, I don’t know Dave too well. I don’t want him taking advantage of you right under my nose.”

“I'm 17 years old Sam. I appreciate the sentiment but I can take care of myself.”

“You're 16, and the closest person to a little sister I have. I've looked after you for my entire life; I'm never going to stop.”

“I appreciate that too. There’s nothing to concern yourself about with Dave and I. But, if we do become friends please just trust my judgment.”

“I can do that. I can also give him the evil eye.”

“Sam Kassmeyer, I don’t think I've ever seen you give anyone the evil eye.” Erin smiled.

“What happened between you and Winsor? I thought you really loved him.”

“I didn’t.” she shook her head. “I don’t even know if I thought I did once or if I just wanted to be a part of something so badly. Don’t ever get into a relationship for that reason, young or old. It will not end well.”

“I'm sorry.”

“Don’t be.” Erin flagged away the notion. “I've got so many other things to concern myself with. For instance, the Myrtle Beach trip is in seven weeks. I’d like to be walking better by then. 

“Ursula and Karen are helping me craft ideas to let the South Carolina boys know why I'm injured. Right now training for the 2012 Olympics is winning by a hair. I wanted to say fencing but it hit too close to home. Ursula decided on modern pentathlon; I actually had to look it up. Fencing is in it.”

“Modern pentathlon huh? That sounds adventurous.”

“I could use a little adventure.”

“Is that why you flirt with Dave Rossi?” Sam asked. “Don’t even bother to deny it. You two were totally flirting that day. I felt like the third wheel on a first date.”

“There's no harm is being done.” She shrugged. “Dave and I aren’t going to move out to Westchester County and have babies. Its summertime; everyone is allowed a little fun. I guess I'm just having mine.”

“Just be careful.”

“I will be. Do me a favor and don’t even vaguely mention Dave and I to anyone. Firstly, there is no Dave and I. Secondly, there's no point in getting anyone up in arms when there is no Dave and I. You know what I mean?”

“Yes.” Sam nodded. “My lips are sealed Erin, but my eyes are open.”

Erin nodded. She didn’t need anyone protecting her. If she wanted to have a summer fling with Dave Rossi then she damn sure would. Maybe bagging a crippled virgin was on his bucket list. Or maybe he meant it when he said he liked her snark. He sent her a text last night while she was in Brooklyn celebrating Independence Day with her family. Erin slipped him her cell phone number just that Friday.

“ _Use this if you want to.” she said._

_“A slip of paper?” Dave raised an eyebrow. “I would but my grocery list for the week is already written down. I might be able to put some lottery numbers on it or something.”_

_“There's already numbers on it.” Erin turned away and started the slow walk back to her mom’s SUV. “Use them if you want.”_

_She really wanted to turn back and see the look on his face. But if she did that she might end up eating a mouthful of dirt. It mattered what his face looked like and it sucked that she wouldn’t see. In the end Erin would have to get over it. What he did with the number was more important than how we reacted to it_.

He asked her if she liked coffee in the text message. It was nearly midnight when she got it. Erin was exhausted from actually having fun. Sam’s Brooklyn neighborhood was having a block party. Uncle Mike was out with the grill. Erin had sparklers, played with some kids, and took a slow saunter (as much as someone can saunter with leg braces and forearm crutches) through an open water plug. 

Then there were the fireworks. She thought that was going to be the highlight of her day until the text message came through. Erin was relaxing on the most comfortable sectional in the world in Uncle Mike’s den. She would be sleeping there since a bathroom was close by and making the steps inside a Brooklyn brownstone was a no-no at the moment. Sliding her phone opened to get to her keyboard, Erin quickly typed a reply.

‘ _I can be a picky bitch about my Joe_.’ –Erin

‘ _You think I'm surprised by this_?’ –David

‘ _What do you want Rossi_?’ –Erin

‘ _Let’s have coffee on Monday sometime. You pick the place and I show up_?’ –David

‘ _Is this the pretend to be into something she likes part of your plan_?’ –Erin

‘ _Yep, is it working so far_?’ –David

‘ _Somewhat, LOL. We’ll meet at Milo’s in the Village. I’ll let you know what time tomorrow. I'm not home and not sure what time I'm getting back to Manhattan in the morning_.’ –Erin

‘ _Just text me and I’ll be there_.’ –David

‘ _I will. Goodnight_.’ –Erin

‘ _Goodnight, Erin, and happy July 4th_.’ –David

“Do you have any plans today?” Sam asked. 

He didn’t want to talk about Dave anymore. Knowing Erin wasn’t a kid wasn’t the same thing as keeping a guy he didn’t know, and therefore didn’t trust, away from her. At the same time Sam didn’t feel entirely comfortable butting in. His just wasn’t the only person who noticed the chemistry between the teenagers. His Uncle Erich would have a cow about Dave Rossi. Nobody needed to see that tirade.

“I'm going out for coffee with a friend. The plan is to go home, nap for a few hours and then head into the Village. You know its still one of the only places I go where people don’t look at me funny when I'm walking around like Frankenstein.”

“That’s why people go there and never leave.” He replied. “It accepts and loves everybody. I want you to have a good time while you're out. It was great to see you have such fun at the block party.”

“It was a lot of fun.” Erin smiled. “I am gonna have fun today. Then I’ll be back at the stables tomorrow to have some fun on my horse. I mean, I know she's not mine but…”

“Summer Breeze has never taken to a rider as she has to you Erin. It seems like she may have met her perfect match.”

Erin was thinking the same thing about something else entirely. Then she shook the thought from her head. Playing the game was OK, but forgetting the rules was unacceptable.

***

“Are you sure you don’t mind walking?” Erin asked. “The sky could open up at any second and the theater is about four blocks away. We could always just hop in a cab.” 

“As long as you’re OK then I'm fine.” Dave replied. “I don’t want to tire you out. I know you’ve got horses and regular therapy tomorrow. Anyway, you said the rain makes you even more tired.”

“I'm fine right now.” She said. 

“You’ve probably got an umbrella in that backpack anyway.”

“I feel like such a kid carrying this thing.” Erin rolled her eyes. In blue jeans and a pink Barnard College baby doll tee, the maroon Jansport made her feel like she was on the sixth grade class trip. “First thing I'm going to do to celebrate getting off these crutches is buy myself a new purse. I miss purses.”

“I like the backpack actually. It's very junior high chic.”

“Oh haha; that’s so funny I forgot to laugh.”

“Is that all you got?” Dave looked at her with a raised eyebrow. 

Erin could only glance at him; she had to concentrate on looking down and then straight ahead. The truth was the walk wasn’t going to be easy for her. She’d been on the crutches for about 3 months and they sucked. But just the fact that she was walking…Erin couldn’t complain too much. 

She was slow and did move around like Boris Karloff. But this had the wheelchair beat by a mile. That was way too _Rear Window_ for her. Erin was trapped in the house for nearly 3 months. Seeing one of her neighbors kill their spouse would've been a blessing.

“I can't walk and be snarky at the same time. It’s either one or the other buddy.”

“Hmm, you better be glad that I like you.”

“Oh really?” now Erin had the raised eyebrow.

“What, you thought I wasted my time trying to get just any girl to fall in love with me? Oh no, no, no, Erin Strauss, only the special girls get the Dave Rossi treatment.”

She laughed, which caused her to have to stop walking. Dave stopped with her. He’d met her at Milo’s for coffee. He was actually a little nervous as this was her turf. But he knew with her injury he had to make some concessions. 

Dave just wanted Erin to be comfortable. She seemed that way at Milo’s. So he would deal with hipster 80s and 90s British modern rock and overpriced coffee with stupid names. It was worth it to snark back and forth with her. It was worth it to flirt and watch her try to hide her smile. It was worth it to occasionally brush her hand while going for the sugar. 

It was definitely worth it for the 20 minute conversation into why, even though they had huge commercial success, Crowded House was still one of the best indie bands on the planet. During the hour there Dave was sure he could listen to Erin talk forever. She could talk about music, weather, and her love of New York. She could even get into just a little bit about her accident. 

He never wanted her to shut up. They weren't going to be able to talk in the movie but Dave would still get to be with her. He’d get to smell her perfume. Maybe he’d even get to hold her hand or whisper something flirty in her ear. 

“Tell me about this movie again.” he said.

“It’s called _About Elly_. I don’t know a ton about it but my best friend Ursula said…”

“Ursula? Like the sea witch in _The Little Mermaid_? Winsor, Ursula; what is with these nouveau riche soap opera names?”

“If she hears you say that about her name she might kick you in the gonads.”

“You just said gonads.” Dave cracked a smile.

“That was immature, David.” Erin rolled her eyes.

“But cute…you forgot to add the ‘and cute’ part at the end.”

“Did I?”

“I think you did.” He nodded.

“Hmm, anyway, they say it’s the best film to come out of Iran in a decade. It’s all about secrets and lies and the things we all keep under wraps. It particularly focuses on people in a country where the truth is often concealed and encouraged to remain so. I'm excited to see it.”

“Well so am I.”

“Are you sure you wouldn’t rather see something with explosions and strippers?” Erin asked.

“This is our first date. We have plenty of time for the Vegas trip.”

“This isn’t a date, David.” Erin shook her head.

“You just keep telling yourself that. Keep telling yourself that you aren’t absolutely smitten with me. It’s cool.”

“Oh please, I don’t like you. I find you mostly tolerable some of the time.”

“Good, I don’t like you either. I don’t like you so much I'm going to hold your hand in the movie. I bet that'll piss you off.”

“It will.”

“Good, then its settled.”

***

“Oh my God, Erin, what are you doing?” 

“Mum!”

Erin fell forward but luckily the bed was there to catch her fall. The teenager grimaced, doing her best to turn around so she could sit. Her mother went to help but Erin shook her off. She didn’t want to be mean but she could do it herself.

“What were you doing? You could’ve hurt yourself.”

“Mum, I didn’t fall until you came in.”

“You need to be walking with your crutches.” Joanna said.

“This is my bedroom…it’s the place I know best in the world. Both my physical therapist and Doc Rawlings said I could start walking slowly in here. I've been doing it for two weeks.”

“I think it’s too soon.” Her mother shook her head.

“Do you want me to be crippled forever?” Erin asked.

“Of course not.” Joanna was aghast. “Why would you ask me that?”

“I'm not trying to hurt your feelings Mum.” She sighed. “It didn’t used to be like this.”

“What do you mean?”

“Sit down.” Erin patted the bed next to her. That was so cheesy but her mother had done it to her for years. Joanna actually did sit down. “You treat me like a fragile china doll. I'm not now and I've never been. I'm hurting, and I need a lot of therapy. There’s going to be pain and frustration and sometimes I might scream out loud, but I need you to let me go not hold me back.”

“I would never hold you back.”

“Maybe you don’t mean to. But you can't delude yourself into thinking you treat me anywhere close to how you did before the accident.”

“I have dreams about it, almost every night.” Joanna said. She sighed, pushing a blonde hair behind her ear. “Your father was at the University and I was here writing. They didn’t even call up to say that the police were here; someone just rang the doorbell. 

“Erin, have you ever felt like you just couldn’t breathe? You're inhaling and exhaling but nothing is happening? I don’t even remember what they said to me. I didn’t scream or cry or freak out…I was numb. But in my dreams they don’t tell me you’ve been in an accident. 

“They tell me that you're dead. So maybe I am holding on too tight. I won't even deny it. But you're my baby. You're the only one I have and could ever have. Be gentle when you tell me to back off and understand that I probably won't for a while.”

“I think I want to go back to school in September.” Erin said. 

It wasn’t that she was thrilled for the whole school to see her walk on crutches with leg braces. She just had to get from under her mother. Erin would do her best to understand; she didn’t have any kids. But at the same time, she’d never been one to stay home under her mother’s skirts.

“It might be a good idea.” Joanna nodded. “If not September then surely after the Christmas holiday. Maybe by then I’ll be ready to let go a little. I know you’ve been making great progress, even just in the past month. The horse therapy has been a godsend. To think I scoffed when Mike brought it up.”

“What do you mean?” 

“You're happier. There are even times when you're glowing. That wasn’t there before the horse therapy. I know it’s not as intense as the physical therapy you have but it’s obviously good for you.”

“It’s OK.”

“And you're walking around your room without the crutches?” Joanna asked.

“Sometimes.” Erin replied. “I'm not going to do anything to mess up all the progress I've made, Mum. I promise. But I've got to push it a little. That doesn’t mean overdoing it. That just means pushing it.”

Erin’s cell phone beeped and she reached across the bed for it. When she saw it was a text message from Dave, she couldn’t hide her smile. They'd had such a good time tonight. And though she refused to call it a date, she refused to call it anything, Erin knew it was something.

“Is that Winsor?” Joanna asked.

“Mum, Winsor and I broke up. Actually I think he might think we’re still together and I do have to address that eventually. We’re through though; it’s for the best.”

“What happened?”

“It wasn’t anything specific.” Erin lied shaking her head. “He just wasn’t the one. I'm only 16 so I didn’t really expect that he was. I have so much going on right now; a boyfriend was more work than I could handle. And Winsor has his own life.” She was looking at her phone again, looking at Dave Rossi’s text message. ‘ _Admit it, you're thinking about me right now aren’t you_?’ Erin started typing something back. ‘ _I’d like to see you prove that_ ’. “I think its all for the best.”

“And you're sure you're alright?”

“I'm fine Mum. Well, I’ll be better when you give me a hug.”

“You're indulging me.” Joanna smiled as she wrapped her arms around her daughter.

“Of course I am but that’s only because you're the best Mum in the whole wide world.”

“I love you so much.”

“I love you too.”

“Hey is this just a mother and daughter thing or can Dad join in?” Erich walked into the room. He’d knocked but no one heard him. When Erin held out her one arm, he sat on the bed and hugged his wife and little girl. Then he heard the phone buzz. “Is that me…?”

“It’s Erin.” Joanna said. “She seems to be having quite an intense text messaging session.”

“It must be Ursula.” Erich smiled. “She can text with one hand while eating something unhealthy in the other.”

“She's a very talented girl.” Erin smiled at her parents. “I'm gonna go to bed soon so…” she picked up her cell phone.

“We’ll leave you to it.” Joanna stood from the bed, putting her arm around her husband. “You and I can talk some more in the morning. I’ll make spinach egg white omelets.”

“OK. I’m gonna sleep in a little but there will definitely be time for breakfast before we go to the stable.”

“Are you sure you want to ride tomorrow?” Erich asked. “The rain is usually bothersome.”

“I have to push it Daddy, just a little.”

“Alright sweetheart.” Erich leaned to kiss her forehead. “Sweet dreams.”

“Goodnight.” Erin waved as they walked out of the room. 

She moved up to the top of her bed and slowly swung her feet up. She checked her text messages and this time it was Ursula. She wasn’t going to be disappointed; it was her best friend after all. The message concerned her a bit though. ‘ _We have a problem…call me_.’ –Ursula. Erin pushed 5 on her phone and grabbed her earphones from inside her nightstand drawer.

“What took you so long?” Ursula asked instead of saying hello.

“I was saying goodnight to my parents. What’s wrong, you don’t sound right.”

“We have a major problem.”

“What?”

“Alex Blake saw Winsor at the White Plains Mall with another girl and she said they were all over each other. Public displays of affection are so tacky.”

“She must have loved to tell you.” Erin replied. “You know Alex hasn’t liked me since freshman year and my getting the last spot on the Forensics Team. It’s petty but she’s been looking to get me back for years now. I was probably no help being snotty about winning.

“I don’t care if Winsor sees other girls. We’re over and I guess I don’t have to retell him. He must already know. Unless he was screwing her before we broke up. Sex was a major issue between us.”

“It was Karen.” Ursula said.

“Karen who?”

“Karen who do you think?”

“Kent…”

“I would not be telling you this if the info wasn’t real. Alex sent me some pictures. I swore her to secrecy; I don’t want the bitch to know we’re on to her. Now I don’t know if I can trust her; I forgot about the Forensics thing.”

“Karen wouldn’t…”

“She would, and she did. Do you want me to send…?”

“No Ursula!” Erin exclaimed a bit too loud. “I don’t want to see something like that. How could she do this to me? Karen’s been my friend since we were kids.”

“And if that’s not bad enough, and that’s bad, she's totally sloppy seconds. She seems to be OK with that. I say we beat the hell out of her.”

“I'm not exactly at my fighting weight.”

“I am.”

“Kent…”

“Why do you always call me by my last name when telling me I can't do something?” Ursula asked. 

“Elizabeth started it I think. I don’t…I can't…I gotta go.”

“Please tell me you're alright, Erin.”

“I'm…I’ll call you tomorrow. I promise OK, I just gotta go.”

“I love you, and I’ll always have your back.”

“I love you too. Goodnight, Ursula.” Erin hung up the phone before even hearing her friend respond. Then she opened up her contacts, pressing the button until she found the number she was looking for. She hit the image of the phone and then listened to it ring.

“To what do I owe the immense pleasure?” Dave Rossi asked instead of saying hello.

“Doesn’t anyone say hello anymore?” Erin asked, tears in her voice.

“What's wrong, Erin?”

“Have you ever been betrayed by someone you love?”

“Yeah. It hurts like hell.”

“So feeling like you want to punch a hole in the wall is normal?” she asked.

“It’s absolutely normal. You had a good day today and you don’t deserve for it to end like that.”

“So make sure that it doesn't.”

“That might be a tall order.” Dave said.

“I'm going to put my faith in you.” she relaxed even more on her pillows and tried to keep the tears at bay. “Talk to me, David.”

***

“You could have a future in equestrian.” Sam said as he helped Erin off the horse and spotted her down the steps. 

“I don’t think so.”

“I haven’t seen someone take to a horse like you have in a long time.”

“Need I remind you that Fancy threw me on my crippled ass.” Erin said once they were on solid ground. “I don’t like horses…I like Summer Breeze.”

“Every rider has a special horse. She's not too old for competition. I'm not talking about the Belmont Stakes but she could be great for dressage.”

“I don’t think so Sam. But it’s so lovely of you to say. Why did Dave have to go in the middle of my ride?”

“He’s getting some of the horses ready for the kids we have coming in about a half hour. We have a group of city kids coming in to see the stable today. Most of them won't want to ride but a few might take the plunge. My dad has a group down three or four times a month. It’s usually on Fridays but he got a Tuesday group this week.”

“Well I’ll be here for an extra hour or so.” Erin said. “Mum had a meeting this afternoon so she can't come and pick me up until she’s done with that.”

“Are you hungry or anything?” 

They were walking together toward the stable. There was always a lot of activity around but today was even more than usual.

“My lunch is in the fridge in the office. Mum made me chicken salad with apples and packed some Wheat Thins.”

“Sounds…delicious.” Sam smiled.

“It’s pretty good. I get junk when I'm out with friends so it’s not too hard sticking to Mum’s healthy living. It’s better for the athlete in me anyway.”

When they walked into the stall area, Erin sat down on her bench. Just 20 or so feet away there was Dave, with Elle Greenaway on his heels. She was in full Brooklyn vamp mode. Erin hoped that Sam didn't notice her noticing.

“Doesn’t she do a job or something?” she asked.

“Who Elle?” Sam turned to look at the scene. “She’s alright, Erin.”

“She's…nevermind. I didn’t know she and Rossi were a thing.”

“I'm not saying a word about it.”

“So they _are_ a thing?”

“Look,” Sam lowered his voice. “If you want to know something about Dave, ask Dave. But since you're not interested in Dave I have no idea why you would want to know anything.”

“I shouldn’t be the only one behind on stable gossip.” Erin reasoned.

“Mmm hmm. Come into the office whenever you're ready. I gotta make some phone calls.”

“OK.” Erin nodded and watched her cousin walk away. 

Then she went back to watching Dave and Elle. His body language seemed to saying ‘leave me alone’ but that might just be wishful thinking. Dave never told her that she was the only girl on his radar. He did tell her that she was special though. Erin knew when they were together that he seemed much more interested than he did in Elle Greenaway. He stayed on the phone with her last night until she started feeling better. 

She didn’t feel comfortable keeping him too long but Dave didn’t seem in a rush. And though she never told him what was wrong, and he never asked, she was able to get some sleep last night. Erin didn’t know what she was going to do about this Karen and Winsor development. When had her life turned into an episode of 90210?

“I'm sorry I had to bail early but we had to get five horses ready for the kids.” Dave said. He was wiping the dirt and hay from his hands and onto his jeans. She would probably think that was gross but he only thought about that after he did it.

“Oh it’s no problem. There seems to be a lot of things to keep you busy here in the stables.” Erin cut her eyes at Elle, who was brushing down a Palomino.

“I like being busy with some things. Others I can really do without.”

“Well I need to go and eat my lunch.” Erin stood from the bench. She put one of her arms in the crutch and then pulled something from her pocket. “You dropped this back in the pit. You should be careful…you're gonna lose something important one day.” She handed him a piece of paper and started walking away.

“Hey!” he called to her. “Don’t you want to stick around and see the look on my face?”

“Take a picture David Rossi, it'll last longer.”

Dave grinned as he opened the folded paper and looked at her gorgeous penmanship. ‘ _The Opus, 272 West 107th Street. I’ll meet you on the rooftop terrace for dinner. The meal is your choice. Be there Thursday night at 8:00. Just go to the desk in the lobby, the doorman will have instructions not to give you trouble. I hope to see you there. Erin_ ’. 

He put the piece of paper in his back pocket and went back out into the sunlight. He was getting in too deep, seeing Erin twice in one week outside of the stable. But there was nothing that would keep him from that rooftop. Dave liked spending time with her. That didn’t make it love or some happily ever after thing. 

Why shouldn’t two people spend time together if they enjoyed it? They may be from two different worlds but that didn’t mean they had nothing in common. He knew he could make her laugh. He knew she made him feel something he probably hadn't felt since he was 14 years old. There had been plenty of girls over the years who tried to get his undivided attention. 

Dave Rossi was known on Commack, Long Island for being a ladies man. But he made sure not to involve his heart. One girl, the first girl, who stole his heart never gave it back. He could do without ever feeling like that again. But as the summer started to sizzle it looked as if Dave’s love life might be doing the same. This time he didn’t want to be burned.

***

Erin didn’t really want to do this but today was the only day all parties involved were available. It was Wednesday evening. She’d gone to occupational therapy for an hour this morning and then had two hours of physical therapy. After that it was home for a nap and shower. Now she was in Morningside Heights, not far from Columbia University where her dad taught. 

She was having dinner at Burger Blitz, where the food was overpriced but always delicious. Ursula was with her; they'd just ordered a large meal of burgers and fries. Erin didn’t think she would be able to eat. She couldn’t stop shaking and felt nauseous. How could this be happening? 

How could she confront her oldest friend about possibly cheating with boyfriend? Not that Erin wanted Winsor in any way, shape, or form. Karen could have him. But Erin was no dummy. There was no way she broke up with him one week and he was with Karen the next. And they were out at White Plains Mall, surely a place they thought they wouldn’t get caught.

“I can do all the talking if you want me to.” Ursula said, sipping her Coke float. “I know you're not OK with this.”

“I just need to get this over with.” Erin sighed. “I have a date tomorrow and I don’t want this junk ruining it.”

“You have a what? Whoa, are we all holding out on each other now?”

“I wanted to tell you…it’s our second date actually. Not that I'm telling him they're dates. I don’t want him getting too cocky.”

“Who is him?” Ursula asked. “Gimme details, I'm dying over here.”

“I promise that I will, just not right now. I have to stay focused. Anyway, it’s just a summer fling. I might, maybe, possibly, want it to be more but I can't say that it ever will be. I need to handle this stuff with Karen, possibly cry my eyes out, and then we can talk about Dave.”

“His name is Dave huh? I like it already. Just tell me where he goes to school.”

“He’s going to City College next fall. Right now he’s working, trying to get a few things taken care of before he gets his degree.”

“Ooh he sounds intriguing. Let’s hurry up and kick Karen’s ass so we can talk about happy things. I think she's coming right now.”

Ursula got up and moved to Erin’s side of the booth as Karen walked in. Approaching them, she waved and smiled. Neither girl was in the mood to reciprocate. Karen slid into the booth. Before anyone could say anything a server approached the table. 

Karen ordered a fruit juice and some potato skins. She didn’t want a big hunk of meat. Burgers weren't really her thing so she had no idea why Erin wanted to meet here. Erin also hadn't told her that Ursula was joining them. It wasn’t that Karen didn’t like Ursula…they'd been friends since the eighth grade. 

But it was clear to her that whenever they were together she was the third wheel. Karen hated that. When it was Erin, Karen, and Elizabeth, things were OK. When it was the four of them they always had fun. But something about Ursula and Karen was like oil and water. 

All these years and she’d never said anything. She didn’t want Erin to pick Ursula over her…they had been friends since they were kids. And Ursula was fun and funny, even if something didn’t quite click Karen always tried her best to amiable. It wasn’t meant to be that she would have something in common with everyone.

“Hey Ursula, I didn’t know you were going to be here.” She smiled.

“Yeah. I had a chance to Lolita my boss tonight but other things were more important.”

“You didn’t tell me I was taking you away from that.” Erin looked at her with wide blue eyes.

“Oh c'mon, you're my best friend…I can get laid anytime. Bros before hoes; know what I mean.” Ursula held out her fist and Erin bumped it.

“I think guys say that, not girls.” Karen said.

“Whatevs, I’m here for my best friend tonight.”

“Well what's going on? You didn’t sound good on the phone, Erin. I know I've just been so crazy busy lately and haven’t been around. I'm sorry, but I'm here now. Tell me what's happening.”

“Why don’t you tell me.” Erin said.

“I don’t know what you mean. I've been stuck doing a lot of filing and bookkeeping and stuff at my dad’s office.” Karen said. “Two file clerks took off for two weeks after Independence Day and the office manager just let it slide so they're understaffed. I'm gonna be busy for a while. I hardly have time to breathe.”

Ursula couldn’t help but smirk. It wasn’t like she needed to breathe with Winsor’s tongue down her throat. She looked at Erin and knew that the blonde knew she was about to pop.

“I know about you and Winsor, Karen, so you can stop lying to me.” Erin said.

“I'm not lying to you.” Karen shook her head.

The food arrived as they stared at each other. All three girls thanked the server and Erin asked for another Coke. She didn’t need to be drinking soda but she was stressed. There was enough going on and she just didn’t need this shit. She was going to confront Karen and get it over with. She didn’t want to hear the lies.

“Look, I know you two were hooking up at the mall and probably everywhere else. There’s no way in hell that you two just started that a week ago. So all I can assume is that you were fucking my ex-boyfriend while he was my boyfriend.”

“Erin…”

“Cut the bullshit,” Ursula did a slashing motion with her hand. “You're a total skank. Seriously, Winsor Hamilton’s sloppy seconds…even someone like you can do better than that.”

“Go to hell, Ursula; I'm not a skank.”

“You're not? Because the last time I checked when a friend has sex with her friend’s man she's a skank. Oh and she's also a shitty friend.”

“Who told you this, Erin?” Karen ignored Ursula. “I'm not with Winsor and I've never been with him. How could you even believe something like that?”

“I believe it because a picture’s worth a thousand words.” Erin reached into her backpack, grabbed the pictures, and practically threw them at her. “Now tell me that these are a lie, Karen.”

She looked at the pictures, looked at Erin, and then at the pictures again.

“Where did you get these?” she asked in a small voice.

“What does it matter?” Erin countered. “You betrayed me. I don’t care that I didn’t love Winsor; I loved you. How long have you two been messing around? Please don’t tell me it was before my accident.”

“It wasn’t.” Karen shook her head. “I never meant for it to happen. We never meant…”

“I think you need to have your dinner to go.” Ursula said.

“I bet you love this don’t you?” Karen asked through clenched teeth. “You’ve been dying to have Erin all to yourself for years. Newsflash Ursula…she’s not going to fuck you.”

“I've got people lined up to do that, and none of them used to date my friends. You're really pathetic as a friend and a woman.”

“Erin, just let me explain.”

“I don’t want to hear it. I just wanted to tell you, to your face, that I know all about it. You can go now.”

“Erin…”

“Go, or I'm swinging.” Ursula said.

Karen just got up from the table and left. Ursula never minded throwing a punch if need be, especially where her friends were concerned. She didn’t need that now. She would try to talk to Erin later, maybe when she was alone.

“I'm so sorry about this.” Ursula said watching her leave.

“Let’s just eat.”

“OK.” She got up and moved to the other side of the booth. The food here was good and Ursula sure didn’t want to waste it, or the money she paid for it. Karen Steyer shouldn’t be allowed to ruin her appetite.

“Ursula?”

“Yeah?” her mouth was mostly full.

“Do you really want to…you know?”

“What fuck you? Hells yeah!” she laughed. “But you're so straight Strauss its ridiculous. You're my best friend. Straight, gay, or somewhere in between, best friends just don’t go there. OK, they go there sometimes but it never ends well. I do not need my life to become a Drew Barrymore movie. 

“There are rules and real friends don’t break them. And don’t go all weird on me because you’ve secretly known that I'm crazy about you since like ninth grade. Remember that night we got bombed at Rachel’s party and I kissed you in the bathroom? I told you everything that night and promised it would never affect our friendship. At least I thought I told you everything…I was so trashed. I could’ve been a public service announcement for underage drinking.”

“I definitely remember that.” Erin nodded with a little smile. “It didn’t freak me out then and it doesn’t now; I promise. Thanks for always having my back.” 

“You're welcome. Now lets eat and then we can get you home before your mom puts out an APB.”

“She’s got late meetings tonight.”

“So that’s why your cell phone hasn’t been blowing up?” Ursula asked.

“That’s the only reason.”

***

“I'm really sorry I'm late.” 

It was almost 8:15 when Erin got up to the rooftop terrace. She couldn’t help but smile when she saw Dave at a table getting their dinner ready. There were two older people there, maybe in their sixties, and they greeted her amiably. The older man actually stood, asked if she needed help.

“Oh no sir, thank you, I'm alright.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, thank you.”

Dave stood when she came over to the table and didn’t sit again until she did. That made her smile all the more.

“I was afraid you stood me up. I would've had to knock on every door until I found you. That would've been embarrassing.”

“My mum was being…well, she was being mum. She needed to know why I would go up to the rooftop when I could read and be alone on our terrace. I told her that I always loved coming up here and I just needed the solitude. It still took me almost 20 minutes to escape.”

“Is she going to come looking for you?” Dave asked.

“I told her not to. I told her I could be up here for a couple of hours but swore I would be OK. I think she’ll worry and then get wrapped up in her work again.”

“What does your mom do?”

“She's the managing editor for _Manhattan_ Magazine.” Erin replied. “She's been a writer my entire life. She and a friend are working on a second novel. Wow Dave, this looks delicious.”

“I remember from talking last week that you like Chinese so I decided that would be a good idea. I got you steamed seafood dumplings with brown rice and broccoli. I brought Coke to drink. I didn’t know what else you liked.”

“I blame you and Sam for getting me hooked on sugary soda. I usually just drink water, natural fruit juices and teas, and coffee. I probably drink too much coffee.”

“I’ll take the blame for the Coke.” He smiled. Erin put her hand over his and he smiled more.

“We’ll leave you two lovebirds alone.” The older couple stood from the bench they were relaxing on.

“Oh please don’t leave on our account.” Dave said. “There's surely enough space for us all to enjoy the evening.”

“I remember having to sneak out to see my young man.” The older woman said. “You two have a nice dinner and a good evening.”

“Thank you. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.”

“That was sweet of them.” Dave said.

“Yeah, it was. Isn’t it beautiful up here?”

“Its very nice.” he looked around. 

“We’re up pretty high but it’s still almost impossible to see the stars. The New York skyline is a bit imposing but you can still see the beauty. This is my quiet place.”

“Is everyone in the building allowed up here?”

“Yes.” She nodded. “It can get a little crazy on the weekends but on a Thursday evening you can sit up here for hours alone. Mmm, this rice is amazing. Do you have anyplace on Long Island that’s a special place just for you?”

“There's a baseball diamond we played on as kids. My best friends Ray Finnegan, Jason Gideon, and I go there, crack open a few beers, and just think.”

“Finnegan, Gideon, and Rossi?” Erin raised an eyebrow. “I can assume you guys were a handful.”

“We still can be. Jason is at Dartmouth, Ray’s still on Commack raising hell, and I'm…”

“You're having dinner with me.”

“Yeah.” Dave nodded. “I am.”

“Right after my accident, when I was still in a wheelchair, I came up here a lot. I contemplated throwing myself over the side. I wondered what it would be like to fall through the air and splat on the ground.”

“That’s unpleasant.” Dave made a face as he ate his dumplings and rice. “Did you actually contemplate suicide? That’s a pretty serious thing.”

“In hindsight I don’t think I was suicidal. I just wanted to feel something, any damn thing other than the constant pain. I felt like my whole life was over…I couldn’t even go to the bathroom on my own in the beginning. I went from being this person with my whole life ahead of me to feeling around in the dark. It wasn’t just about will I fence again, I wasn’t sure if I would walk again. I had to figure out if my strength was in who I was on the outside or the inside.”

“You're strong Erin.”

“I know.” She nodded. “I don’t always feel that way though, and it’s OK.”

“A lot of us don’t. Some people think I'm a lost cause and treat me that way. If I based how I saw myself on how they saw me I’d be in a lot of trouble.”

“Uncle Mike doesn’t think that.” Erin said. “I don’t think that.”

“Your Uncle Mike is one of the good guys. I know he's going to write me a stellar letter and then I can move on with my life. I don't know what I’d do if he wasn’t there doing what he does. Imagine being 30 years old and still being judged for the idiot shit you did when you were half that age.”

“I watch _Law and Order_. I know its just TV but I thought juvenile records were sealed when you turned 18.”

“They are, but it doesn’t take much to get your hands on that info. It would kill my chances for college and anything after. If I get it expunged that won't happen. I’ll always know I did it but I earned the right to have it removed.”

“Did you commit felonies?” Erin asked. 

She didn’t know the difference between felonies and misdemeanors where juveniles were concerned. They could be charged as adults for things like murder and rape. She was sure things like burglary and arson were still pretty serious offenses no matter how old you were. But juveniles also got into trouble for vandalism or truancy.

“I was just an idiot.” Rossi smirked. “There were fights, some tags for underage drinking, and some vandalism. I never hurt anyone; I'm not that kind of guy. There was also the troublesome walking around Italian after a certain hour. 

“Some cops can be real douchebags about that one. My most serious offense was being in the passenger seat of a stolen vehicle. I didn’t know the car was stolen. OK, I suspected it but definitely preferred the ‘don't ask, don’t tell’ policy with some of the acquaintances. Anyway, the judge didn’t care. 

“He’d seen my face a few times for petty shit and he gave me two years probation and 200 hours of community service. He said if he saw me again it was jail time for sure. The probation ended a few months after my 18th birthday. When it was over I swore I was done being a dumbass.”

“I don’t think you’ve stuck very well to that swear.” She smiled.

“Oh haha.” Dave made a face and nudged her shoulder. She looked at him and he wanted to kiss her mouth. He wanted to kiss her mouth on Monday as well but he didn’t. And he didn’t think he would tonight either. He went for his Coke instead. Maybe that was disappointment Dave saw in Erin’s eyes but he wasn’t going to focus on it.

“I can admit to a growing fondness for Coca-Cola. I'm trying to figure out how to convince my mother to buy it.”

“I can admit to a growing fondness for a few things as well.” Dave replied.

Erin just smiled, popping the top of the Coke can and drinking it. There were plenty of things she wanted to say and ask but found herself tongue tied. Then she was mad because he made her feel that way. When she first met Winsor and they hung out before dating, Erin felt in complete control of the situation. Yes, she liked him but had never felt anything close to this.

“Remember when I told you that I broke up with my boyfriend?” Erin asked.

“Yeah.” he nodded.

“I just found out recently that he and my best friend were doing it on the side. Nice huh? I confronted her about it and she actually tried to lie. It was all very _Dynasty_. I don’t want my life to be _Dynasty_.”

“He sounds like a douche.”

“Maybe he always was.” Erin replied. “I mean he was attractive, smart, witty, and athletic but for the past few days I tried to remember conversations we’d had or special moments and I'm coming up blank. It was all superficial bullshit. And when I wasn’t perfect anymore he went and fucked the second string quarterback. By the way, I don’t think I was perfect I'm just making a point.”

“I understand.”

“Do you have a girlfriend?” 

“Well if I did then I would be a douche because I'm here with you.” Dave said. “Are you volunteering?”

“Volunteering for what?” she felt the flush creep across her collarbone and face. She was wearing a blue camisole so she hoped Dave didn’t notice it as well. If he did Erin hoped he had the decency not to call her on it.

“C'mon Strauss, don’t be shy. Just say you wanna be my girlfriend. And make sure you say it slow and enunciate…I want to absorb the moment.”

“Ooh, enunciate,” she laughed. “That’s a big word for a lug from Long Island.”

“I actually read.” Dave said. “Yeah, like real books and shit. Some women find that unbearably sexy.”

“Some women are easy.” 

“C'mere.” Dave slipped his arm around her neck and pulled her close to him. Erin shivered at the contact. “I'm only going to kiss you if you want me to Erin. I'm not that pushy guy and I don’t think because I bought you dinner that you owe me a damn thing.”

“You're just the guy who’s going to make me say it, aren’t you?” she asked.

“How about just for tonight I say it? I want to kiss you. I want to kiss your cheeky mouth because I like the fact that it’s cheeky.”

Erin smiled and Dave kissed her smile. His lips were warm; his goatee tickled her skin. She shivered again as she leaned in closer and deepened the kiss. At least she wasn’t an amateur at this…she and Winsor did it all the time. It never felt like this with him though. 

With Dave it was like flying through the air. For the first time in a long time Erin wasn’t thinking about the splat afterward. She wasn’t weighing the pros and cons or thinking how it might look on her transcripts. All she cared about was his lips, the way he smelled, the way he moaned softly, and his fingers through her hair. Nothing else on earth mattered.

“I'm not a good guy Erin.” he murmured as their lips came apart. Their foreheads stayed together.

“You're a decent kisser. I can tell you that’s points in your favor.”

“You're not so bad yourself.” Dave traced his finger across her cheek. 

He wanted to say more but the pull of her mouth was too strong. This didn’t need to turn into the plot of an afterschool special. She was the rich girl and he the bad boy from the wrong side of the tracks. Dave didn’t want Mike, Sam, and surely not Erich Strauss coming down on him for seducing Erin. He didn’t want to be her summer distraction either. 

He’d been there done that. It wasn’t half as fun as teen movies had you believe. The truth was Dave’s life was in limbo. He knew some of the things he wanted but was still unsure of how to make them happen. Was it fair to pull Erin, who seemed to have herself together for the most part, down a thorny, unknown path?

“Would you be upset if I said we should be friends?” Dave asked. The kisses ended for just a moment.

“Do friends get to kiss?” she countered.

“Woman, I feel used.” He smiled.

“We don’t know each other that well. I might want to be more than friends but we can call it that while getting to know each other better.”

“Maybe while we do that we shouldn’t discuss this with other people.”

“Oh God,” Erin rolled her eyes. “I will never have another secret boyfriend. It’s like summer camp all over again.”

“What happened to that guy?”

“He secretly dumped me on the bus ride back to school. Ursula gave him a black eye for his trouble. I knew I should've held out on letting him feel me up.”

“Friends don’t feel each other up.” Dave replied.

“That’s a pity.”

“You're…”

She was and he was smitten. How was that possible after just five weeks? Yes, he saw her twice a week and they could banter back and forth like Katharine Hepburn and Cary Grant but this shouldn’t be happening. Erin might have some kind of bad boy thing. 

Dave didn’t want to be part of her teenage fantasy. He wanted to run. He wanted to be the grownup, put a stop to this, and just run. But he was kissing her again, caressing her face, and not giving a damn if it was fantasy or reality. It felt amazing.

“Erin?”

“Daddy?”

She froze for a moment when she heard his voice. Dave moved away from her and she turned and looked at her father. Erich Strauss just stood there looking slightly confused and a little concerned. He slipped his hands into the pockets of his expensive chinos as he surveyed the scene.

“Your mother said you came up here to read and relax. I just came to check on you and say hello. I didn’t know you had company.”

“Dave brought me dinner.” Erin cleared her throat. “Um, you remember David Rossi, Daddy? He works with Uncle Mike.”

“I remember him.” Erich Strauss stared at him as he walked closer to the table.

“It’s good to see you again, Dr. Strauss.” Dave stood from the chair and extended his hand. “I surely wish it would've been under less embarrassing circumstances.”

“Hello David.” Erich shook his hand. “You brought Erin dinner?”

“Yes sir; she likes Chinese. She invited me over to enjoy the lovely view from the rooftop.”

“I see.” He looked at his daughter again. “Your mother didn’t mention that you had company.”

“She didn’t know Daddy. I wasn’t trying to hide him, I just…we’re friends.”

“Alright. Well, you finish your dinner and then come on downstairs, OK?”

“Yes Daddy.” Erin nodded.

“David, maybe we’ll see each other again soon.”

“Yes sir.”

Erich turned and walked away. If there was a chance Dave could’ve jumped off the roof and survived then he surely would have. He was probably going to call Mike right now; Dave would be fired by morning.

“This isn’t good.” He said to Erin.

“My dad isn’t a bad guy. He’s not going to ruin your job for you.”

“He didn’t look happy.”

“He didn’t look unhappy.” Erin said. “That’s his neutral face, I promise.”

“I should probably still go.”

“No, you should stay.” Erin took his hand. “Stay, enjoy your dinner, and talk to me. If you don’t want to kiss anymore I get it, but we’re friends. Friends enjoy a meal and talk. If you really want to go then go, but you should stay because I really want you to.”

Dave only thought about it for a few minutes, and then went back to eating his Chinese. His heart was beating a little too fast and he thought he might be sweating but he didn’t want to go. Anyway, if he was about to lose it all he could at least say that he and Erin had a great night together. Dave honestly didn’t come there to kiss, he came there to eat. So that’s what he was going to do from that point on.

000

“Hey Daddy.”

Erin came back downstairs about 45 minutes later. Her mother wasn’t in the living room or the den but her father was relaxing in the study on his laptop.

“Hey sweetheart, sit down.”

She smiled as she did, not sure what was going to happen. She’d been truthful with Dave, Erich’s face hadn't been unhappy. That didn’t necessarily mean that he hadn't called Mike and told him to fire the Long Island Lothario. Dave had bigger plans in life than to get an Upper West Side girlfriend and if Erin had any kind of hand in ruining that she would never forgive herself.

“I didn’t know you and David Rossi were such good friends.” Erich said looking at his daughter over his laptop.

“We’re just getting to know each other better. I like him; nothing weighs me down when we’re together. But I don’t want him to lose his job at the stable because we’re friends. He needs that job, and he likes it too.”

“You think I would do that?”

“I hope that you wouldn’t Daddy. But I don’t want you, Uncle Mike, or anyone really to think Dave’s trying to manipulate the rich crippled girl. He's not that guy.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.” Erin nodded. “I'm a pretty smart girl, Daddy, and I read people well. Dave just wants to be Dave.”

“He's a criminal, sweetheart. I do my best not to judge him as a person. As a friend of my daughter, I can judge the hell out of him.”

“He has a juvenile record, yes. He’s working at the stable so that Uncle Mike can write him a letter to help get it expunged. Then he plans to attend City College. He has plans and dreams and I enjoy talking to him about them.”

“Is this why you broke up with Winsor?” Erich asked.

“No,” Erin shook her head. “I did that because he was a jerk who was cheating on me. It had nothing to do with Dave. Tonight was the first time we saw each other outside of the stable.” She lied but it wasn’t going to hurt anyone. “I’d like to see him again. He wants to see me too.”

“I'm asking you to be careful. You're only sixteen years old Erin; you're not a grownup yet. I don’t want you thinking that I seek to control your every move but I am concerned. How old is he?”

“He's nineteen. I'm being careful, I swear. Is it alright if we keep seeing each other? I don’t know if it'll lead to anything but I've been listless since the accident. With Dave I don’t feel that way. 

“He encourages me to express myself and have fun.” she smiled. “He likes me just the way I am and doesn’t want me to change or be perfect. He doesn’t care that my family has money. He’s not poor…his father owns his own landscaping business on Long Island. Just give him a chance. You gave Winsor one and he didn’t deserve it.”

“I'm watching him closely.” Erich said. “You're my little girl; I'm not going to shy away from being _that_ father if I have to be.”

“I know Daddy.” She nodded.

“I love you, Erin.” 

He put the laptop down on the table beside his chair. Erich got up, went over to the couch where Erin was sitting, and sat beside her. When he hugged her, Erin smiled. She loved her father but she cared about Dave. It was her life to live and she wanted to live it to the fullest. After what happened to her it was what she deserved.

“I love you too, Daddy. Thank you for being OK with this.”

“I know you well; you do what you want. I’d rather have a tentative peace accord and keep an eye on things. Nothing should drive a wedge between us, especially first love.”

“I'm not calling it love, Daddy.” Erin blushed. “It’s just…”

“Its something.” Erich said, still holding her close.

“Yeah it’s something.”

***

“And then he came rushing through the door with an Uzi, screamed ‘no one sits Baby in a corner’, and sprayed the place with bullets. Am I close?”

“Not at all.” Erin laughed.

“Oh well, that would've been pretty cool. It would've been very un-Erich like but still epic. I'm sure it was still traumatic.” Ursula said. “Remember when my dad caught me hooking up with Rachel Harding. He took soft-core porn moment to a therapy moment in less than 60 seconds. That has to be a record.”

“It was an interesting moment for sure. I know my dad wasn’t exactly thrilled about it but he's going to trust me. But I think that was more the kissing than the Dave thing. He won't say anything to Uncle Mike to make trouble for Dave. I'm going with the flow on this.”

“Well you have to tell me more about him. Start with the important stuff. Is he a good kisser?”

Erin and Ursula were relaxing in her bedroom on Sunday afternoon. It was the only day of the week Erin wasn’t in some kind of therapy and she was grateful. She’d done exercises at home and was now relaxing in her favorite overstuffed chair. Her legs hung over the arm like always. Ursula was on her bed painting her toenails. 

The color was called Moonlight Violet, which was just a fancy name for purple. It was Ursula’s new favorite color and matched the streaks in her light brown hair. Erin didn’t know anyone who dyed their hair as much as she did. Ursula’s parents never seemed to mind though Erin wouldn’t call the Kents neglectful. They just let Ursula be Ursula. Her friends were happier for it and so was she.

“He's a magnificent kisser.” Erin did her best not to swoon thinking about it. It was like the first kiss from a movie. Everything about it was perfect. “I know I don’t have tons to compare him to but Dave has Winsor beat by a million miles.”

“Who else have you kissed over the years?” Ursula asked. “What about Will Hodges, I know you kissed him. Is Dave better? Oh, and Evan Abby…you hooked up with him at that party a few weeks before you started dating Winsor.”

“They were both OK. But Dave is definitely better. He makes me feel all tingly and I get these knots and butterflies in my stomach. I'm nervous, happy, excited, and all these other emotions rolled into a giant ball. But it’s about more than kissing. He makes me laugh, Ursula. He’s snarky and such a smartass but he's never malicious. Dave likes getting a rise out of me.”

“I bet you like getting a rise out of him too.” Ursula laughed.

“It’s not like that. I mean, the spark is there but I don’t think I'm ready for something like that. We want to get to know each other first. We want to be friends.”

“Friends? So you two aren’t a thing? Are you holding out for love?”

“Actually I'm holding out for more mobility in my legs.” Erin said. “I at least want to be able to move when it’s happening. I remember when Winsor was getting pushy…I just felt so out of control. I want my control back and I want to enjoy it. Sex should be mutual. Hooking up should be mutual.”

“Fair point.” Ursula nodded. “So what's this about you two being friends?”

“We just want to get to know each other better. Dave’s not moving to Zanzibar or anything at the end of the summer. We have time to have steps and milestones. We don’t want to rush.”

“That’s a fair point. Sometimes there's nothing like being with someone and it just explodes into the atmosphere. But it never lasts that way. The slow burn can be sexy and hot. I totally respect that. Speaking of slow burn, guess what happened to me on Friday night?”

“Tell me, tell me.” Erin was excited. Nothing beat Ursula’s stories. She was a natural born storyteller and you only had to hear one once, true or embellished, to know that.

“Evan invited me over after my shift for dinner and a movie. His daughters are away at camp. They’re just nine but his sister is the assistant director there so he felt they would be safe.”

“You went to his place?”

“He lives in Brooklyn Heights; it took forever to get there. But he had fresh calamari and thought grilling it was a good plan. We were gonna eat, drink, and watch a movie. Russ hooked me up with a kickass bootleg DVD of _Twilight: Eclipse_. I asked Evan if he’d ever panned a movie before. He said he hadn't in a long time so I told him he was in for a treat.”

“So did you two do it?” Erin asked.

“Hells yeah, we panned the hell out of that movie. I don’t think I've laughed so hard since you, me, and Liddy watched _Anchorman_. I snorted and didn’t even care.”

“Ursula, you know that’s not what I was asking.”

“We did it but damn, let me set it up woman.”

“Just tell me…don’t make me tickle it out of you.” Erin wiggled her fingers. “These are deadly weapons and know every sensitive spot on your body.”

“But you can't catch me.” Ursula stuck out her tongue.

“Touché. Tell me what happened.”

“OK, he was nervous. He kept saying I was too young as we were taking off each other’s clothes. I told him I was as into him as he was into me and nothing about it was wrong. I don't know if he believed me or not but he did loosen up some. He asked if I was a virgin.”

“Did you tell him the truth?” Erin asked.

“I had no choice; he would find out in a few minutes anyway. I told him I was experienced but had been waiting for the right guy to come along. He asked if I was sure about it. I gave him the sweet, innocent nod.” Ursula smirked as she reached for her peach mango juice. “And then I blew him. I'm not slutty because I love blowjobs am I?”

“No.” Erin shook her head. “You're still pretty picky about who you give them to. How did it feel?”

“It was pretty much what I expected. It hurt but wasn’t the most painful thing in the world. I would describe it as discomfort more than anything. I bled, more than I thought. There was no way in hell not to make that strange and uncomfortable. 

“So…two and a half out of five stars I guess. Maybe three because afterward he did draw me a hot bath and give me a bowl of ice cream. He actually had one for himself too and hung out in the bathroom with me. Evan is a super good guy. His kids aren’t coming back until mid-August so I'm hoping for more sleepovers. By the way, my parents think I'm staying with you.”

“I figured as much. I doubt they’ll ever check up but I have your back.”

“Thanks.” Ursula smiled. “Has Karen tried to call you?”

Erin didn’t want to talk about it. That didn’t make a lot of sense because of all of her friends, Ursula knew everything. With other friends, even with Elizabeth and Karen, Erin held back some things. It had never been that way with Ursula. Of course Erin had never discussed another friend the way she would Karen from that point on. It was strange. It was uncomfortable and painful. She’d lost enough and now she had to deal with this too.

“Hey, if you don’t want to go here you know I totally understand.” Ursula sensed her friend’s hesitation. She didn’t want Erin to feel like she had to rag on Karen. Just because Ursula hated her guts didn’t mean Erin had to. Their friendship wasn’t contingent on that. And losing a friend was like mourning a death. Erin deserved time to do that properly.

“She left me three voicemails. I didn’t want to listen to them but I did. They just made me angrier. I want to be the bigger person, I do, but how could she do that to me. It’s just inconceivable that it even happened. Winsor called too but I erased his voicemail. That asshole is no longer my problem. I’ll have to face all of this eventually but I can't right now.”

“Do you think you can ever forgive her?”

“Absolutely not.” Erin shook her head. “A real friend would never do something like that. I can never trust Karen again. I need to let go and it'll take time but I will. These past seven months have been all about change. This is just another one.”

“I'm really sorry. I know you're sick of hearing people say that but I hurt when you hurt, chica.”

“Thanks. Now we need to talk about something happy. Let me tell you all about dinner with Dave. He brought me Chinese.”

“Ooh yes,” Ursula tapped her drying toes on the bed sheet. “Let’s talk about happy, awesome stuff. So you said he was a good kisser…”

***

In the three and a half months he’d been at the stables, Dave never missed a day of work. He was there Monday through Friday, 9:30 to 3:30. One Sunday a month he worked the same hours. Before he left on the third Sunday in July, he stopped by Mike’s office to punch his timecard.

“Hey Mike?”

“Yeah Dave?” he looked up from his paperwork.

“Is it alright if I don’t come in tomorrow? I'm sorry for the short notice but I can make up the hours doing an extra Sunday. My dad needs a little extra help on a job and he asked me.”

“That’s fine. You can do the Sunday after next; I've got all the help I need on Saturdays.”

“Thanks so much, that’s great.” Dave smiled. “I’ll see you on Tuesday.”

“Before you go,” Mike reached into his top drawer and pulled out a large manila envelope. “I apologize beforehand for being presumptive but I know you were showing an interest in City College. I'm an alumnus myself and still have friends there. I had one put a packet together for you.”

“Are you serious?” Dave reached for the envelope.

“Your sentence here is up mid-January so that’ll be too late to apply for spring classes. But you can get all the paperwork done and make it in for the next fall. If you need any help, let me know.”

“Wow Mike, I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything, just promise me that you'll do it. The deadline is February 1st so that gives you plenty of time. If you need anything from me then I'm here to help.”

“OK.” Dave nodded, said goodbye, and went out to his car. 

That was a really awesome thing for him to do. There was no way that Erich had called to complain that Dave was defiling his precious little girl. He wasn’t in the mood to be grateful to Dr. Strauss even if he was a little. How would they both react if they knew he wouldn’t be with his father on Monday but alone with Erin? He probably shouldn’t think about that right now. It was OK to think about being alone with Erin. Her father and cousin’s reaction to it was something else altogether.

000

She had no idea what to wear. Erin didn’t want to look easy but planned to dress casually. The blue tank top was fine but Erin wasn’t sure if jeans were a good idea. They weren't always easy to move around, or get frisky in. Shorts would be better but would she go for denim or elastic.

In her second drawer Erin had a bunch of workout clothes. She couldn’t help but smile when she saw the blue Adidas track pants. These would be perfect. They were relaxing and it wouldn’t look as if she was planning a seduction. Erin Strauss had never planned a seduction in her life. Now wasn’t the best time to start. 

Dave was coming over for lunch and a movie. She really just wanted to be alone with him and relax. They were always surrounded by people; constantly chaperoned even if people didn’t know that’s what they were doing. Whatever happened this afternoon would happen. Erin wanted to go with the flow and just enjoy herself. Now she would focus on positive thoughts while brushing her teeth and figuring out what to do with her hair.

***

She’d never been kissed like this in her life. She had no idea that it could make you feel this way. Erin felt heavy but also weightless. She tingled in places that had surely never tingled before. She felt so hyper aware of everything around her. There was the rain falling outside the window, the soft rustling of the blanket underneath her, the thump of her heartbeat, and the blood racing through her veins. 

She and Dave had burgers, fries, and shakes from Five Guys. Then they began to watch _Elizabeth_. It was one of Erin’s favorite films and it was awesome to watch wrapped in Dave’s embrace. He’d never seen it before; didn’t seem to mind that she chattered through it. But it wasn’t aimless conversation. Erin loved the Tudor era and she wanted to tell Dave all about it. He wanted to listen. Then he wanted to kiss. To his delight, she seemed to want the same.

“Oh God,” she moaned as their lips came apart. Erin didn’t know how many minutes, or hours, had gone by. She didn’t care.

“Are you alright?” Dave’s voice was tender when he asked.

“I'm…” she smiled, closing her eyes as the cranberry flush moved across her skin. So this was what she was missing? It seemed improbable that Erin could feel this with just any guy. She certainly never once felt it with Winsor. “Wow.”

“Yeah.” Dave kissed her neck and then her collarbone. 

She smelled so good, tasted so good; wanting her as much as he did was pulling him under. It had been too long but Dave thought he would have more control. When Erin invited him over this afternoon he knew the deal. Her parents weren't around and she wanted to watch a movie. They might watch a movie, sure, but he’d been using that euphemism for years. 

No matter what happened he knew that they wouldn’t go all the way. Dave was sure that Erin was a virgin. He didn’t want her to fall in love with him even though he was falling for her. He wanted to put on the brakes; didn’t want either one of them to get hurt. She put her foot over his and stepped on the gas. At this point he had no idea who was in control. They were speeding dangerously close to the cliff.

“We won't do anything that makes you uncomfortable.” Dave pulled away with Herculean effort.

“I'm not uncomfortable.” Erin replied, smiling as she caressed his face. “I'm feeling great as a matter of fact. I’d feel better if you kissed me again.”

Dave moaned, wrapping her in his arms, and pulling her closer. Pressed together was even more awesome. Erin was no amateur in the kissing department. She would surrender to him in one moment, and in the next demand control. It was a serious turn on. Dave’s body had no choice but to respond. 

Erin’s seemed to be doing the same. She was the one who took off her tank top in the few moments that their bodies separated. She wasn’t wearing a bra. How can something be so euphoric and not good all in the same breath? Dave took his tee shirt off as well. He wanted to touch her, skin to skin; touch her all over and feel her reaction.

“Erin?” he whispered in her ear before gently taking the lobe between his lips.

“Yes?” she trembled, taking his hand in hers.

“We probably shouldn’t over think this but…are you sure?”

“Yes.” Erin nodded.

“Because I'm sure if you're sure.” he kissed her. “I want you, baby.”

“I'm sure. But I don’t…I've never gone all the way.”

“We’ll go slowly and we’re not going all the way. We stop when you say stop.”

“What if I say don’t stop?” even while blushing Erin still managed a cheeky grin.

Dave didn’t answer, he just kissed her again. When he cupped her breast, gently squeezing, he felt the jolt of electricity go through her. The way Erin’s back arched and she whimpered let him know it was going to be a long and amazing afternoon. He calmed down just a bit, letting instinct take over for his nerves. Dave Rossi had done this a million and one times. Erin was special though, he didn’t want to mess this up. He had to bring his A game.

“Mmm, Dave.” Erin giggled as he kissed and played with her nipples. Was it supposed to tickle? Was she supposed to laugh? Since it didn’t seem to alarm him it must have been a natural response. “Ohhh God, wow…”

His fingers played with the elastic of her pants while making love to her breasts. Her lips were a beautiful thing. Her neck, chest, breasts, and belly were a paradise he might never want to leave. What was below her belly was the undiscovered country. It was where no man had gone before. Officially third base, Dave was one run from sweet victory. But there wouldn’t be that kind of victory today…there were other ways to enjoy themselves.

Erin seemed to be going with Dave’s wandering hands. She whimpered, moaned, giggled, and writhed, which was exactly what she was supposed to do. Once Dave went there he became unforgettable. Not because he was awesome, necessarily, but because he was the first.

His fingers finally crept along her sensitive skin, making her moan. He stroked the hair between her thighs and liked the way she smiled. She shivered so Dave held her closer. He kissed the side of her mouth, then her full lips. Coaxing her lips open with his tongue, Dave also coaxed her thighs open with his hand.

The kisses deepened as his hand touched her most intimate place. Erin gripped his back since her arm was around him. She never wanted the feeling to end. There were tingles in her toes and butterflies in her belly. There were no words for what his touch did to her. Erin knew many words but couldn’t think of one. Inside her brain everything was hazy and jumbled, like that one time she and Elizabeth smoked a joint. She couldn’t think of words then either...and giggled a lot.

“David, oh David, oh God, oh my God.”

“I just want to make you feel good, baby.” He was sucking her earlobe again and his other hand stroked her breast. She was close; he could feel it.

“I…oh God, don’t stop, don’t stop!”

She had no idea where the noise came from. It was a half-whimper, half-roar as the first orgasm as Erin’s life shook her to the core. She shivered, moaned, and closed her eyes tight. As Dave kissed her, caressed her, she floated on air. Tears formed in the creases of her eyes.

“How do you feel?” Dave whispered.

“I feel…”

“Don’t worry, the words come back.” Dave grinned. “At least they should.”

Erin opened her eyes just in time to see the triumphant look on his face.

“Wipe away that victory smirk, Rossi.” She said, turning his arms. 

That was no easy feat with the leg braces. Erin laid on her back most of the time. Though the metal was state of the art and supposedly lightweight, it wasn’t made for quick movement or comfort. She didn’t care at the moment. 

She wanted to be a normal teenage girl and cuddle with her lover. The rest she would deal with later. Could she call him her lover now? He wasn’t her boyfriend but this also wasn’t a Catherine Deneuve film. Dave lay on his back, holding her close.

“I don’t think I will.” He said. “I'm glad you liked it. You’re supposed to like it.”

“Yeah, it was alright.”

“I told you the words would come back. Just alright, huh?”

When he looked at her Erin was smiling. Dave couldn’t help but kiss her smile. He’d just thrown the rulebook out of the window. He had to go with his gut. For better or worse he wanted to hold on and never let go.

“Is there something I should do for you, David?” she asked. “I know guys like oral sex.”

“Wow, I didn’t see that one coming. Are you always so forward?”

“Well not that you're anything like Winsor but he was always angling for it. I don't know what he bugged me for…Karen was probably giving him all he needed.”

“You don’t have to do anything for me, Erin.” he replied, holding her closer. The way her breasts pressed on his side made him warm on the inside. “I won't lie, oral sex is awesome, but it wasn’t my endgame. I touch you because that makes me feel as good as you.”

“Impossible.” She shook her head.

“No, it’s true. I'm not that guy…I'm not the give to get guy. You do whatever makes you feel comfortable and I’ll do what you tell me.”

“So if I told you to shut up and let me do something dirty to you?” Erin asked.

“I’d have no choice but to listen.”

Erin didn't say anything else, she just laughed. Then she kissed him and went down on him. That wasn’t easy with the leg braces either. If she could do it for that prick Winsor, who did nothing in return, she could damn sure do it for Dave. Asking what this afternoon meant to their relationship was on the tip of her tongue but she didn’t say a word. 

Dave had made her no promises. Erin feared asking for any would push him away. Just because their banter was awesome didn’t mean it was meant to be. Just because Erin was blowing him didn’t mean Dave wanted a girlfriend. Other girls surely came before her.

So she would stay quiet and make him cry out her name. That was really awesome. Even if it never happened again, it happened today. Erin would be happy for today.

***

“Thanks for meeting me, Jessie.” 

“It’s not a problem. I'm off from work today so I was free.”

“You must be busy though, getting ready for college and all.” Erin said.

“There's actually not a whole lot left to do. We’ve been dorm shopping and stuff but mostly I'm just working…and spending time with Sam of course.”

“That’s actually what I wanted to talk to you about.”

“About Sam?” Jessie asked.

“Sort of. This is a little embarrassing but I have to do it anyway. Sam and I are very close.”

“You're like his little sister; he loves you as much as he loves Sean.”

“Yeah.” Erin nodded. “Sometimes talking to an objective third party is the best way to go. This is embarrassing but I don’t really know where else to turn.”

“I’d definitely never judge you.” Jessie shook her head. “We can talk about whatever you need to Erin.”

Jessie and Erin weren't friends though the two girls got along. They'd never even spent time together outside of being with Sam or other members of his family. Jessie was surprised when Erin called her and asked if she could meet her at Milo’s. Still she was cordial and said yes. If there was something she could help her with then she would. 

She knew Sam would feel good about that. That wasn’t the only reason Jessie was doing it. Being an only child must have been tough. It surely had its benefits but sometimes nothing beat always having someone there to talk to. Jessie would fill those shoes if it made Erin feel better.

“OK, but I need to talk about sex.”

“Oh um,” Jessie smiled. “I surely didn’t expect to hear that but I’ll try to be helpful.”

“When you and Sam have sex is it awkward? Well I don’t mean every time I just mean the first couple of times really. Were you in love when you first did it or not? Was it spontaneous or planned out? I'm not very good with being spontaneous and we should know these things about ourselves. But it’s possible that I might want to appear spontaneous. 

“Or should I just be myself? He likes me as I am and maybe it’s a bad idea to make him think I'm something I'm not. If I'm myself though I’ll want to talk about it too much because it is a big step and scary even though I'm not exactly scared. I just don’t want him to reject me, for whatever reason he might do that. Do guys even reject sex?”

It took Jessie a little while to process everything that Erin said. Firstly, she was talking too fast. Secondly, her questions were quite personal. Thirdly, this was a huge leap since the girls hadn't gone beyond the niceties in the almost two years that they'd known each other. 

“Wow um,” she laughed some. “That’s more than a mouthful I think.”

“I'm so sorry. I'm just…” Erin sighed. “I didn’t want to talk to my friends about this. They're just too close and want too many details. They're not virgins but they’re surely not experienced either. Plus you and I aren’t extremely close and you're mature enough that you would be real with me. I need reality right now more than anything, even if it’s not what I want to hear.”

“I appreciate that. The truth is that Sam and I haven’t had sex yet. We plan to wait.”

“Wait for what?” Erin asked, trying and failing to hide her incredulous tone. “You guys have been dating for two years. You love each other right?”

“We love each other very much. I honestly don’t think we’ll make it to our wedding night, though we have discussed it. We just plan to wait until we’re both ready. It might be Christmas break. Don’t tell Sam I know but I overheard him telling Aaron Hotchner that he’s getting me a promise ring.”

“Seriously? Oh wow Jessie, that’s really awesome. But there's been no sex?”

“Not yet no.” Jessie shook her head. “I mean it’s not as if we’re Amish about the whole thing but…”

“I get the hesitation.” Erin said. “You totally don’t have to give me dirty details. I don’t want them really. I just need two words; we’ll use baseball metaphors. Which base have you gotten to?”

“Second. I want to say third but we've never had oral sex. Sam doesn't want to be the guy who pressures his girlfriend into blowjobs. We've talked about it but sometimes I want to be spontaneous and crazy too. Sometimes Sam talks a little too much. Is this about Dave Rossi?”

“How did you…?”

“Sam told me a little about it.” Jessie replied. “Every time I come to the stables you two are making eyes at each other.”

“No we’re…we are?”

“You are.” She nodded. “You're thinking about sex with Dave? You two hardly know each other? I promise I'm not judging, I'm just asking.”

“We’re getting to know each other. This isn’t about next week or anything. We went to third base recently and it was awesome.” Erin smiled from ear to ear. She didn’t do that very often. “He makes me feel so good, Jessie, and I don’t just mean when we’re half naked. 

“I laugh with him, and we go back and forth and I never want to stop. We can talk about anything and I want to. He listens to me. I want to kiss him and experience every little thing and big thing I can with him. I want it to be David. And he doesn’t give a damn about these braces on my legs.”

“So you're saying that you want him to be your boyfriend?” Jessie asked.

“He might not be into that.”

“Why not?”

“It’s so conventional. I'm just a senior in high school and Dave is past that time in his life. Do you know what I mean? I don't know if he wants to be saddled with the boyfriend-girlfriend thing. I don’t want him to change because of me; we’ll just resent each other in the end. He should be allowed to be himself.”

“What about you being yourself? You’re into the boyfriend-girlfriend thing. Sometimes there's a spark between two people and you're on fire whenever you're around that person. That doesn’t always mean that it’s something long lasting. It could only be for a moment in time.”

“I get that, I do.” Erin nodded. “But if I feel that fire and want to go all the way, should I stop myself? Years from now when I'm a boring grownup I know I would never look back and regret Dave being my first.”

“So you'd just be OK with him disappearing when fall comes?” Jessie asked. “I'm not saying he will but it’s a viable question since you seem so intent on not changing him.”

“No I wouldn’t be OK with that. But as long as we can end it in a way where I don’t hate him I won't look back on the time and call it a failure.”

Jessie didn’t quite believe her. People told themselves things to justify behaviors or to keep from being hurt. Erin would be devastated if Dave walked away. It looked as if she was smack in the middle of first love. The feelings were raw and intense. 

Jessie didn’t want her to get hurt but even if everything went as Erin wanted it to that could still happen. Love, real or perceived, could be prickly, fickle, and painful. Of course you only fell so far because it got you higher than you thought you could ever go. And that was the rub.

“This is something you need to talk to Dave about.”

“I was hoping to avoid that. I guess I can't, huh?”

“No.” Jessie shook her head. “You're never going to have the answers unless you get them straight from the source. It might be weird and uncomfortable but it’s for the best. I'm no psychiatrist so feel free to tell me I'm wrong but I think you know what you're asking underneath all of this. You want to know that Dave feels the same as you do. Even if it’s all fleeting, just a summer thing, you want to know if it’s as intense for him.”

“Yes.”

“He's the only one who can tell you. Anything else is just speculation. That kind of thing can lead to all kinds of trouble.”

“But what will I do if he doesn’t?” Erin asked.

“You just have to risk it and talk to him. You’re never going to be able to get past where you are right now if you don’t. I don’t know Dave at all but I hope he wouldn’t be deceptive with you. Even if you hate his answers I have a feeling you could never hate him.”

Erin didn’t think she could hate him. He made her too happy for that to happen. But August was right around the corner and everything was happening so fast. She was shopping and planning the Myrtle Beach trip with her friends. She was still reeling from the Karen and Winsor thing. 

Erin definitely wanted to return to school in September to complete her senior year. There was more therapy to come and surely less time to spend at the stables. When autumn came their lives would move in separate directions. That was just the way it was. 

If they wanted the next chapter of the story to have another ending then they would have to write it. They would have to do it together. That wouldn’t be possible if she didn’t ask Dave how he felt. Too bad it felt like the hardest thing Erin ever had to do.

***

Dave tried not to smile as he got off the elevator and walked down the hall. He knew what happened the last time he was in Erin’s condo. That wasn’t happening this time. In fact he’d be facing the Great Wall of China as soon as the door opened. Dave didn’t need to look happy, sad, angry, or anxious right now. His face needed to remain neutral and above all, trustworthy. 

“Good evening, David.” Erich Strauss opened the door.

“Hello Dr. Strauss.”

“Come on in; Erin will be out in a moment. I don’t believe you’ve met my wife Joanna.”

“Hello Mrs. Strauss.” Dave smiled and shook her hand. “I've heard so many wonderful things about you.”

“I've heard nothing about you David. My husband tells me that you and Erin are friends.”

“Yes ma'am.” He nodded. “We met at the stable; I work for Mike Kassmeyer.”

“Both Erin and Mike were telling me of your plans to attend City College in the fall.” Erich said. He and his wife sat on the couch. He waved Dave to a chair and the young man sat. He also nodded.

“Mike just recently gave me a packet. If I'm accepted I’ll attend next fall and plan to major in sociology. Right now that’s as far as I'm willing to go in thinking about it. I don’t want to get my hopes up. But I’m also considering applying to John Jay.”

“And you're taking Erin to a baseball game tonight?” Joanna asked.

“Yes ma'am. The Brooklyn Cyclones are at home against Williamsport. My best friend Jason and his girlfriend Nora are meeting us there. Dr. Gideon has had season tickets for years.”

“Dr. Gideon?” Erich asked.

“That’s Jason’s father. He teaches in the Philosophy Department at Fordham University.”

“Hmm.”

“What do your parents do, David?” Joanna asked.

“For the past 22 years my father and two uncles have run Rossi Landscaping and Construction. My mother teaches social studies at Commack Middle School.”

Erin walked into the room and smiled. Dave stood as soon as he saw her. She looked cute in denim cutoffs, pink Wonder Woman tee shirt, and her ever-present Adidas sneakers for extra ankle support. Her blonde hair was wavy tonight. He didn’t know how she did it but he liked it.

“Hey.” He smiled too.

“Hey, I'm sorry about the delay. We better get going so we’re not too late.”

“What are you driving tonight, David?” Erich asked.

“I have my mom’s Durango.” He replied.

“That’s fine. Erin’s curfew is 11:00.”

“It is?” Erin looked at her father as she and Dave walked to the door. 

Her parents were right behind her. Not once had they ever mentioned curfew before. Well they had on school nights but never in the summer. All the parties and crazy things she’d attended with her friends in the past, whether she got crazy or not, and not once had they mentioned curfew. What was the deal? Erin didn’t have the energy to get into it at the moment but she would.

“Do we have your permission to extend that to 11:30, sir?” Dave asked. “We’ll be coming back from Coney Island in a lot of traffic I'm sure.”

“Permission granted.” He nodded. “You kids have a good time tonight.”

“Thanks Daddy; see you later Mum.”

“Do you have your cell phone?” Joanna asked. “What about emergency money and pepper spray?”

“I'm thinking I won't need pepper spray.” Erin replied.

“Are you sure?”

“I'm sure. I’ll see you later.”

“Goodnight, sir. It was nice to meet you ma'am.”

“Goodnight David. Be careful and have a nice time.”

The teenagers left, walking slowly to the elevator at the other end of the hall. Dave noticed that Erin was getting a lot better on her crutches. There was still a long road ahead but she was definitely on the move.

“Are you alright?” she asked.

“I'm good, why?”

“I'm sure they interrogated you back there. I'm sorry I was taking so long.”

“Its fine, Erin; your parents are fine. They seem like really nice people.”

“What are your parents like?”

“They're cool. I have three older siblings and three younger ones. There weren't supposed to be so many of us but mom had a set a twins her first and last pregnancies. They run on both sides of the family.”

“You're the middle child?” Erin asked pushing down on the elevator. “Well that explains so much.”

“Jan Brady gave us all a bad rep.” he put his arm around her and gave her a kiss. Dave smiled, doing it again for good measure. “My best friend Jason is meeting us at the game with his girlfriend. Are you OK with hanging out with them tonight?”

“Sure.” she was instantly nervous but did her best to hide it.

“He's nerdy and cool so there's nothing to worry about.” They walked into the elevator after she did. “He won't try to hit on you or be a snarky bastard…he's nothing like me.”

“Of course he isn’t.” Erin smiled. She wanted another kiss so she stole one. Rossi clucked her under the chin. “They say opposites attract. I think that means best friends as well as couples.”

Erin couldn’t wait to ditch the crutches so they could hold hands or put their arms around each other. Of course she wasn’t sure Dave would even be around when the crutches and braces were gone. She’d been going with the flow, trying to be super cool about everything. But the paranoid Erin came seeping through the cracks. 

There were a million questions she wanted to ask but didn’t know how. She’d replayed the conversation with Jessie Brooks so many times in her head that Erin was now dreaming about it. Then she dreamed she tried to talk to Dave and he laughed at her. After that she didn’t want to think about it anymore.

“Thank you.” Erin smiled as Dave opened the passenger door of the Durango for her.

“Are you OK?” he asked when he got into the car. “You might not know this but you get these little crinkles on your forehead when you're thinking too hard or worried about something.”

“I'm fine.” She smiled.

“You also have a picture perfect smile when you're lying. Your real smile is beautiful but it’s not perfect. I think that’s what I like most about it.”

“Where do you come up with all your game, Rossi?” she opened her mouth and cheeky Erin came out.

“There's a book but I refuse to tell you the title. A man has his street cred to maintain.”

“I have ways of getting what I want out of you.”

He didn’t say a word as he drove, Dave just glanced at her. She had this look on her face that there weren't quite words for. Erin was happy but there were other emotions there too. That was the first thing about Erin Strauss that intrigued Dave. She had 101 sides. 

He thought it was possible to know her forever and there would still be unopened doors. That wasn’t a thought that held him back. It actually made Dave want to run full speed ahead. For one of the first times in his life, something told him to slow down and wait. She was worth the wait.

000

“I'm messing with your radio stations.” Erin laughed as she pressed the buttons on the XM radio and found Carly Simon singing _You Belong to Me_. “What are you going to do about it?”

“I'm not going to do anything.” Dave grinned. “You're messing with my mom’s radio stations actually. She loves Carly Simon so I think she’d appreciate this.”

“I don’t care, I'm still having fun.”

“Have at it, Erin Strauss.”

“Thank you, I will.” She leaned back in the seat.

“Did you have fun tonight?” Dave looked at the clock. It was 10:37, ten minutes fast, so he had plenty of time before Erich Strauss’ deadline.

“I really did. I've never been to a baseball game before.”

“I couldn’t tell.” He smirked.

“Don’t make fun of me.”

“No, no, I’d never do that.” Dave laughed.

Erin laughed too. She loved baseball games now. She loved the noise and the action. She loved the camaraderie and the chants. The pretzel bites were delicious, the fountain Coke her new favorite. Dave bought her a Brooklyn Cyclones baby doll tee and pennant. 

She bought the cap for herself. It was a wonderful evening. Jason Gideon and Nora Bennett were friendly and fun. They all talked about college, music, and plans for the last days of summer vacation. Erin couldn’t help but watch the couple. 

Jason seemed so happy whenever Nora was. They were always holding hands or had their arms around each other. She found out they’d met at the beginning of spring semester at Dartmouth and were surprised to both be from the New York area. Jason said the attraction was instant and Nora agreed. Erin thought it was just wonderful. 

She watched Dave make fun of Jason and his best friend take it. Then she watched Jason make fun of Dave. They even did that punching thing, how guys prove they care by taking the hard lumps from each other. She would definitely love to spend more time with them if she could.

“I leave for Myrtle Beach in the middle of next week.” She said.

“So, is South Carolina ready for the Invasion of the Upper West Side?” Dave asked.

“I'm not sure.”

“Me neither.”

“When I get back there's only about a week left before school starts. Mum and I are making a trip to The Hamptons for Labor Day weekend. Her friend Lillian invited us for one last summer hurrah. Mum thought I deserved it since I had to miss so much because of the accident.”

“That sounds like fun.” Dave said. “I’ll be at the Jersey Shore leading up to Labor Day weekend. I'm leaving on Tuesday the 31st and driving back on Sunday the 5th in what's most likely a futile attempt to beat traffic. I'm back at the stable on the 7th.”

“Once school starts the only time I’ll have to ride is Saturdays.” Erin said. “Even without all of my usual extra-curricular activities I’ll still be in therapy three days a week.”

“I don’t work on Saturdays.” Dave replied.

They were both quiet for a while. Toto replaced Carly Simon on the radio as they drove into Manhattan. Erin nearly gasped when she heard the lyrics. Dave just gripped the steering wheel tighter.

_If I had another chance tonight  
I'd try to tell you that the things we had were right  
Time can't erase the love we shared  
But it gives me time to realize just how much you cared_

_Now you're gone, I'm really not the same  
I guess I have myself to blame  
Time can't erase the things we said  
But it gives me time to realize that you're the one instead_

“I don’t want to stop seeing you. I know we joke back and forth about your plan to make me fall in love with you and I'm not saying that I'm in love with you, I just…” she stopped to take a breath and get her words right. Erin couldn’t over think it, she had to speak. “I'm just used to your face, that’s all. 

“I like how I feel when we’re together and I think you feel the same way. But I get it Dave; I totally get it if this is just a summer fling for you. Spontaneous, crazy things happen in the summer. Everyone is allowed to have a spontaneous affair when it’s hot in the city. No matter what happens I just want to look back fondly on every moment we spend together. 

“I just think we could have more moments. Maybe I'm being naïve, I don't know. This is all new to me and I thought I could be breezy and badass, and I am. But I'm also not sometimes. I hope that made sense.”

“It made sense.” Dave nodded. His brain was running a marathon trying to keep up with her words. He didn’t think that Erin had spoken that fast since they met two and a half months ago.

“So we don’t have to decide anything right now. I’ll go away, you’ll go away, and there will be some distance between us. Then maybe in a few weeks we’ll meet up and talk or something.”

“OK.”

“OK?” Erin asked, finally finding the courage to look at him. She’d been staring so hard at the windshield that her eyes began to water. Erin didn’t want Dave to think she was upset and crying. She hadn't been reduced to that…yet.

“Yeah, OK.”

“OK then.” She said it again and nodded.

Dave listened to Barry Manilow as he turned on the windshield wipers for the light rain. He was glad it hadn't caused trouble at the baseball game.

“Oh God, Barry Manilow…really?”

“My mother loves Barry Manilow. She still has some eight tracks.”

“Would you punch me if I said I wasn’t surprised?” he asked.

“I’d consider it.”

“If you punch me, I'm kissing you. Just thought I should let you know.”

“You shouldn’t provoke violence in me, David Rossi.”

“You’ve punched me before; I can handle it. Can you handle being kissed?”

“I think I've done alright so far.” Erin said. “And I went easy on you with the punches.” 

“Not a single thing about you is easy, Erin. I like it better that way.”

***

“You have to tell me how you got these into the country.” Ursula said as she puffed on the Ziganov Black Cherry clove. 

“I stuffed two cartons into my toiletry bag.” Elizabeth replied. “In customs when the guy asked me what was in the bag I told him feminine products. He stuffed it right back into the suitcase.”

“Wicked.” She smiled.

“I'm sure your father being the U.S. Ambassador the United Nations had something to do with it as well.” Erin said. She was smoking a clove too. She indulged just once in a while with her girlfriends. 

She was an athlete after all and needed all her lung power. But Elizabeth was a monster on the field hockey team and she smoked two a day. Without any sport to play, Erin wasn’t in the mood to decline anymore. “Anyone else may have gotten their pads dumped all over Kennedy.”

“I'm not prepared to argue with that.”

The girls were sitting on Elizabeth’s bedroom terrace relaxing. Erin and Ursula were both children of wealthy families and privilege. Erin’s mother, the former Joanna Parkinson-Kane, could even trace lineage back on her mother’s side to the reign of James I. Joanna had royalty in her blood whether she chose to brag about it or not. Elizabeth Prentiss was American royalty.

The Prentisses had been a part of American politics since its infancy and remained so to this day. John Colby Prentiss, known as Black Jack to his friends, was in John Adams inner circle and helps build the United States of America. 235 years later, Alexander Barrington Prentiss was keeping the tradition alive as the U.S. Ambassador to the United Nations. Twenty years ago he was said to have scandalized his family by marrying the former Constance Miller. 

Constance was a character actress, underwear model, and had a recurring role on a TV show that lasted two seasons. With her raven hair and green eyes, she bore a striking resemblance to Liz Taylor in her heyday. That was how their daughter got her name. No one thought the marriage would last, they wished for its demise, but Alex and Connie were still together and quite happy. Her parents, as people, lovers, spouses, and parents, taught Elizabeth everything she needed to know to succeed in life. She planned to do it with aplomb.

In just two days the girls were leaving for Myrtle Beach. All the plans were finalized; they would be staying with Ursula’s cousin Amanda at her beachfront condo. She was a writer and lived a total bourgeoisie bohemian lifestyle. That was what Ursula aspired to when she grew up, as long as it involved being a college professor as well.

“These are good.” Ursula leaned back in her chair until the front legs were off the ground. “Can I have a pack?”

“I’ll even give you one for free. They retail for like 12 euro in Paris.”

“Damn, that’s expensive.” Erin said.

“Well they really are the best. What time is it?”

“Almost four.” Ursula looked at her watch.

“You guys have to go soon.”

“You're throwing us out for Tom again?” Erin asked. “We've hardly seen you since you’ve been back.”

“Well we’ll be together for a week of fun on the beach. Tom and I…”

“Have sex like bunnies.” Ursula finished her sentence. “Seriously, there are times when I want to get a crowbar and pry you two apart. Liddy Prentiss is robbing the cradle and enjoying every moment of it.”

“He is not that much younger than I am.” Elizabeth said.

It freaked Elizabeth out when she first fell for Tom Barton. They met at the Model U.N. almost two years ago. He was a year younger and one grade below her. She avoided him like the clap and when she could no longer do that she turned him down every chance she had. But the York Prep freshman was persistent and he won in the end. There were those who talked smack, and it bugged Elizabeth, but she loved him. And they really did have great sex.

“How did you make it for practically the entire summer in Paris without a fix?” Erin asked laughing.

“Are you kidding? We had so much Skype sex it was ridiculous. It was pretty hot too.”

“You are such a ho.” Ursula laughed. “I love you but you are a ho.”

Elizabeth laughed and puffed away on her clove.

“Speaking of hos, please tell me we get to kick Karen’s ass before leaving on vacation.”

“Lids…”

“Oh c'mon, don’t tell me you feel any sympathy for her Strauss. Did your bitch factor get injured with your legs? She was fucking your boyfriend. And I don’t care that you dumped him for being a douche, she was your best friend. If I ever found out one of you was fucking Tom, I’d kill you. I’d hire Johnnie Cochran and plead temporary insanity.”

“Johnnie Cochran is dead.” Ursula said.

“You know what I mean. Karen pulled a total Anne Boleyn, which is an insult to Anne Boleyn. She needs to be handled.”

“You sound like you work for the Mafia.” Erin almost smiled. 

She knew that Elizabeth meant well but was also seriously angry. When Elizabeth was angry it was difficult to bring her down. Being from a political influential family she believed in payback and it would always be a bitch. As hard as she tried, Erin couldn’t face all that happened yet. She wanted to talk to Karen, not necessarily with kindness, but couldn’t bring herself to even think about it. It was too much to bear that someone she knew for half of her life could do that to her. How do you even trust again knowing that?

“I just want to know why.”

“There's only one reason.” Ursula said. “She's a skank. She’s an easy skank and Winsor honed in on that. She’s totally dead to me. You two do what you need to but she is so dead to me.”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Erin said shaking her head. “I'm just trying to move on. That’s hard enough, its going to impossible if we don’t stop bringing her up.”

“I'm sorry.” Elizabeth put her arm around Erin’s shoulder and leaned on her head there. “Can we talk about your new boyfriend? I hear he's a roughneck.”

“David is not a roughneck. Who did you hear that from?”

“Isn't he from Long Island?” Elizabeth asked.

“You're such an elitist snob.” Ursula laughed. “I adore you but holy hell, Lids. The median income on Commack is like $120 grand a year. OK, its not Kennedy money but roughneck, not exactly.”

“David’s family doesn't have that kind of money I don’t think.” Erin said. “Not that money matters. He's just a good guy. We’re um…”

“It’s a little complicated right now.” Ursula said.

“Well what do you know that I don’t? Dammit, don’t keep me in the dark. I want to know too.”

“We’ll talk all about him when we go away. Right now we’re taking a little break from things because we have a lot to do. I don’t know what the future holds and I think my head will explode if I spend too much time thinking about it. In fact, almost everything I could be thinking might cause my head to explode. I need this trip guys; I haven’t been out of Manhattan since Thanksgiving of last year. That’s never happened to me before in my life.”

“You need the sea air.” Ursula said. “Are you going to be OK to go to the beach?”

“I might need some help getting around the sand.” Erin replied. “And I can't go in the ocean, which sucks, but I'm going to enjoy everything I can.”

“I'm excited.” Elizabeth said. “I know I've been gone all summer but this is one last hurrah before senior year. “I can't believe high school is almost over. God, I never thought it would end. What time is it?”

“Its time for us to go.” Erin laughed. “You're insatiable, Liddy.”

“I've missed him…he really is an amazing guy. I do wish he was about five years older though. Not as much as I used to but I still do.”

“He will be one day.” Ursula stood up. 

Erin and Elizabeth did as well and they made their way from her terrace, through her bedroom, and out to the living room.

“I’ll call you later, Erin, and we’ll talk.” she hugged her best friend.

“What am I?” Ursula asked. “Chopped liver?”

“Shut up.” Elizabeth kissed her cheek. “Do you guys have plans this afternoon?”

“I'm definitely not in the mood to go home.” Erin said. “I don’t know what I want to do but…”

“We’ll head to the Village. There's always something going down there.”

“That’s a good plan.”

“OK ladies.” Elizabeth hugged them both. “I’ll see you later.”

“Ooh, can I get some of those cloves?” Ursula asked.

“Right.” Elizabeth went to her bedroom, grabbed two packs of Ziganovs, and gave them to her. “Don’t be greedy with these…the next pack will cost you.”

“You sound like a drug dealer.” Erin said, laughing as they walked out.

Elizabeth waved at her best friends, blew them kisses, and closed the door.

“She's going to get ready for Tom.” 

“There's not much to do.” Ursula laughed when they got to the elevator. “She’s going to be naked except for some expensive perfume.”

“They really do go at it like bunnies, don’t they?”

“He's quite an attractive boy. He's also from a good family and has a very bright future. It’s probably even brighter with Elizabeth in control of it.”

They were laughing as the elevator opened and Tom Barton stepped off. He looked good in blue jeans and a grey New York Marathon tee shirt.

“Hello Erin; hey Ursula.” He smiled.

“Hi.” They said in unison.

“You must be happy to have Elizabeth back.” Ursula said.

“I am, yes. Unfortunately, she's going to be gone again in a matter of days.”

“So you guys are spending as much time together as you can.” Erin said.

“Yes.” Tom nodded. “It was good to see you guys.”

“Bye Tom.”

There was pep in his step as he quickly walked to the Prentiss’ door. Ursula and Erin just laughed as they got onto the elevator. They were all best friends but they didn’t know the ends and outs of Elizabeth and Tom’s relationship. It was the subject of as much talk and speculation with them as it was with the masses. But it seemed to suit both Elizabeth and Tom just fine.

“Coffee and a movie?” Erin suggested as they got off the elevator of 15 Central Park West and made their way outside. It was a hot, muggy day. More storms were on the way…August had been a rainy month.

“What about coffee, more coffee, and possibly snacks as we contemplate a movie?” Ursula asked.

“That sounds good.” she nodded. 

They hailed a cab and headed to Greenwich Village. It was definitely too early to go home. Erin wanted to hang out and have some fun. She missed Dave but didn’t want to be that girl. Even if she was thinking about him, Erin had no intent of talking about it 24-7. 

There were still plenty of things to enjoy. She had her friends, her trip, her family, and a couple more weeks of relaxation until school started. Deep in her belly she felt like she might never see Dave again. Erin knew that was the slight paranoia talking. It happened to her when she wanted something badly enough. 

It happened before every fencing match, when she went out for the Forensics Team, and as she waited for her college acceptance letters. The nagging voice just made her work harder, push farther. It was that nagging voice that sometimes got her out of bed in the morning. It made her do her leg lifts and ride on the exercise bike at therapy. Erin would get through this time just like she’d gotten through the rest of them. Whatever happened she planned to come out stronger on the other side.

***

It was one of those rare, chilly, rainy nights on the South Carolina oceanfront. Erin sat on the back porch wrapped in a blanket. She missed the days of being able to curl up; sitting would just have to do. She had a cup of hot cocoa and milk, hoping it would help her sleep. 

The condo was quiet; it seemed as if the whole world was. It was after 1am but this was probably the earliest night the girls had since they got there. They stayed up late playing games, talking, laughing, watching movies, and going through Amanda’s vast collection of cheap wine she bought for their visit. But tonight they were in bed by midnight. 

They all were except Erin. She seemed to have insomnia. She’d been sleeping in her own bed for so long that sleeping in another proved difficult. That was strange for someone who spent so much of their life traveling for one reason or another.

She was holding her cell phone in her hand and just looking at it. Earlier that evening she got a text message from Dave. Erin was happily surprised. She knew that saying they were taking some time to clean up the last of their summers didn't necessarily mean not speaking to each other at all. Still, she decided that she would do her best to give him some silence and space. 

He seemed to have been doing the same. Then she got the text. ‘ _I hope you're having fun. Don’t break any of those Southern boys’ hearts_ ’ –David. She waited almost a half hour, an agonizing half hour, before typing a reply. ‘ _Sorry this took so long, I was busy breaking a heart_ ’ –Erin. 

They texted back and forth for a little while. Nothing beyond the pleasantries, but Erin missed it when it stopped. She sipped her cocoa, and opened the contacts on her phone. Not wanting to be presumptive, Dave wasn’t one of her speed dial contacts. She pushed the call button when she got to his name and listened to his cell phone ring.

‘ _You’ve reached Dave’s cell phone. If you're sure I'm the right Dave and this isn’t an ex, solicitor, or heavy breather leave a message. I’ll get back to you_ ’. **BEEP!**

“Hey Dave, it was nice texting with you tonight. I'm having a great time here on the beach and I just wanted to say hello and wish you a safe trip to New Jersey tomorrow. Don’t do anything that I wouldn’t, OK? Feel free to call me back or send a text. I um…I miss you. Goodnight.”

Erin hung up the phone and sighed. Where had the summer gone? It seemed like she had all the time in the world one minute and now there was hardly any left. Senior year was going to kick her ass. She was prepared for it but that didn’t make it any easier. Luckily her leg injuries wouldn’t prevent her from doing Forensics, and she would also still write articles for the school paper. 

Being busy was a good thing though. Before her accident, Erin didn’t have any free time. She was in school, practicing, fencing, or studying. She didn’t want it to be like that senior year. There would be work and surely studying but she also wanted to have some fun. Who would've ever thought that shattering her legs would remind her that she needed to get out and get a life?

When the cell phone vibrated in her hand it scared her. Erin looked at the display and saw his name. David. She thought about letting it go to voicemail but didn’t want to play that game. She wanted to talk to him.

“Hey.”

“Hey. What are you doing up at this hour?” Dave asked.

“It’s raining here, that chilly rain. I know that should put me to sleep but its not happening. And that sucks a little since this was the first night on the trip I would've gotten to bed at a decent hour.”

“You're putting a hurting on Myrtle Beach, huh?”

“Not really. I'm having a good time though. Are you ready for the shore?”

“It's gonna be a blast. So much of my family will be squeezed into one house there will be no choice but to have fun.”

“Where down the shore will you be?” Erin asked.

“We have a house in Cape May. It used to belong to a man my dad always did landscape work for. When he retired to Florida five years ago he sold it to my dad really cheap. It was an offer he refused to refuse. So we take as much advantage of it as we can. My mom spends a lot of her summer there with my younger brothers. I missed your phone call by a hair.”

“It’s alright. I didn’t have a lot to say. I just wanted to say hello.”

“Hello Erin Strauss. Do you miss me?”

“You wish.” She laughed.

“The snarkier you are, the more I know how much you adore me.”

“Do you ever stop?”

“Only when you tell me to.” Dave replied. “Feel free never to tell me to.”

“I have to go. It’s late and I should at least try to sleep.”

“Well keep having fun and I’ll see you soon.”

“Thanks. Have a good time in Cape May.”

“Goodnight, Erin Strauss.”

“Goodnight.” 

She hung up her cell phone, finished the cocoa, and made her way into the house. This was perfect sleeping weather and Erin needed to take advantage of it. There were just a couple more days here. She and her friends wanted to squeeze in all the fun possible. That would take more strength than Erin had at the moment. 

She was bound to feel better after a good night’s sleep. Talking to Dave helped. She wanted to say more; was sure she could’ve talked all night. Hopefully there would be more time in the future to do that, and not just on the telephone. Erin was sure she’d think about it in her dreams tonight. But to dream she had to sleep and it was time to go to bed.

***

“Erin? Sweetheart?” Joanna knocked on the door and then poked her head in. “Erin?” 

“Yes Mum?”

“Can I come in?”

“Yes.”

Erin was slowly walking around her room getting things ready for school tomorrow. Her mother just watched her for a little while and looked over at her crutches, leaning against Erin’s favorite chair.

“You're getting better at that.” Joanna said.

“I'm not ready for a marathon yet but honestly I am aiming for being rid of the crutches by Thanksgiving. At the very least I want them gone by year’s end. Doc Rawlings said I can get a cane. It’s a little weird but there are some cool models out there. 

“Remember the guy’s in _Jurassic Park_ with the mosquito in it? And there’s always the Moses staff. If it’s good enough to part the Red Sea then its good enough to get me down the halls of Chapin. What's up?”

“Karen’s here.”

“Karen who?” Erin asked. She knew that was a silly question as there was only one Karen in her life. At least there used to be.

“Your best friend Karen.” Her mother replied.

“She's not my best friend anymore.”

“I know you didn’t tell me what happened but its clear you two had a falling out.”

“Something like that.” Erin mumbled.

“Well she's here and she wants to talk to you. Do you want me to tell her to go home?”

“Yes…no. I knew I’d have to do this eventually and its time. Tomorrow starts a whole new chapter. There's been a lot of them lately, this book is getting long and complicated.”

“You're a teenager.” Joanna smiled and kissed her cheek. “It comes with the territory. You're doing fine though; better than fine. I’ll tell her that you'll be right out.”

“Thanks Mum.”

Erin slowly made her way over to her chair as her mother left the room. She was putting on her crutches when her phone started to vibrate on her nightstand. She went to pick it up and looked at the text message. It was Dave and it made her smile. ‘ _Good luck with everything tomorrow. We’ll talk this weekend_.’ –David. 

Erin sat down on the bed. She sighed as her fingers moved over the phone’s keyboard. ‘ _Karen just showed up at my house out of the blue. It might be possible that we talk tonight. If not, definitely Saturday_.’ –Erin. She put the phone back on the nightstand and went out to the living room. Karen was sitting on the couch looking both pissed off and nervous.

“What are you doing here?” Erin asked.

“Vanessa Hill called me the other night and told me that she heard I got the clap this summer from messing with some other girl’s boyfriend.” She stood up. “So that’s what this has come to, Erin? You’re starting rumors about me?”

“I didn’t start any rumors about you.”

“Then where did she hear it from?”

“Why didn’t you ask her? I don’t even think about you Karen, much less care enough to do something so vicious and silly.”

“Its going to be all over school in the morning I'm sure.”

“I don’t care. I’d like it if you got out of my house.”

“Winsor loves me.” Karen said. “Winsor loves me and I love him. I'm sorry if that hurts you, so truly sorry, but you can't pick and choose who you fall in love with.”

“You know what, you're right. You really can't. But you can choose not to be a sneaky whore and have sex with your best friend’s boyfriend behind her back. You can choose to be better than that. Or not.”

“I never meant to hurt you but he makes me happy.”

“That’s really sweet.” Erin smirked. “I've spent a lot of time thinking about it. I wish I hadn't because you're not worth it, but I have. You covet, Karen. You always have and you always will. 

“You're never going to be a good friend because you always want more. You want what you don’t have, more of what of what you’ve got, and a little something extra. You have Winsor now…enjoy him. He doesn’t last long. And maybe years from now when you find some other friends and dust off the dirty looks and the rumors, you'll think twice about hurting the people who care about you. 

“Maybe one day you'll have it happen to you and know how much it fuckin sucks. Maybe you won't. Maybe you'll grow up and see that sex or status or stuff isn’t more important than human beings. I don’t know, and I don’t care. But I will never speak to you again. 

“Don’t ever come to my house and don’t ever contact me. I want to be the bigger person; I am the bigger person. Because if I wasn’t I would beat the living hell out of you right now. I don’t care if the whole school thinks you're a whore. 

“I won't dignify anything I'm asked with a response. You don’t deserve it but I do. I deserve not to let who you are and what you’ve done drag me down any further than I've already been. Now get out.”

Karen looked as if she wanted to say more but she didn’t. She just picked up her purse and went to the front door. Erin made her way into the kitchen and grabbed the cordless phone from the wall. She didn’t usually use the landline but this was important and it would take too long to get back to her room. She dialed the number she knew by heart and listened to it ring.

“Hello? Erin is that you?”

“Would you happen to know anything about a rumor circulating?” Erin asked.

“Oh sweetie, rumors are like reality stars…a dime a dozen. What's this one about?”

“Karen has the clap from sleeping with someone’s boyfriend.”

“Hmm, really, I heard it was gonorrhea.”

“Liddy…”

“What?” Elizabeth asked. “I didn’t start it, I just heard it. Fuck that bitch.”

“While I can agree with that I'm not down with trashing someone’s name.”

“Even if they deserve it? Look Erin, I am all about your taking the high road. But whatever happens to her happens. Everyone who knows you knows who and how you are. You’re as clean as a virgin on prom night. Karen went there so she got what's coming to her.”

“Tell me you didn’t start it.” Erin said.

“I didn’t start it.”

“OK, tell me you didn’t get the ball rolling on a smear campaign, Elizabeth.”

“I could but…”

“Dammit.”

“Tomorrow is the first day of our last year of high school. You have more to worry about than the skank who screwed your ex. Get a good night’s sleep, put on those kickass Docs you bought, and wear your best smile. Nothing else matters.”

“I didn’t want this.” She said.

“I know you didn’t but sometimes things happen that are out of your control. You of all people know that Erin.”

“Goodnight.”

“Don’t be mad at me.” Elizabeth said.

“I’ll get back to you on that tomorrow.”

“Goodnight.”

Erin hung up the phone, sighed, and made her way to a kitchen chair. That’s where her father found her a few minutes later. He’d come into the kitchen for an apple.

“Are you alright, sweetheart?” Erich asked.

“I'm OK Daddy.”

“Are you sure?” Erich went to the fridge for an apple and bottle of water. He was already into the second week of classes at Columbia.

“It’s just some teenage drama. Karen and I aren’t friends anymore and she accused me of starting rumors about her.”

“You're not friends anymore? You and Karen have been friends since the fifth grade. What happened?” he got a plate from the cabinet, a paring knife, and joined his daughter at the table. Erin smiled as he began to slice up the apple.

“Daddy, she slept with Winsor behind my back. They’re a couple now.”

“Are you serious?”

“I'm serious.” Erin nodded as she took a slice of apple. “I had already broken up with him when I found out. But they’ve been secretly a couple for a while. Anyway, I don’t want to get too into it. Our friendship is over.”

“I'm sorry sweetheart but that’s the right thing to do given the circumstances. So she thinks you started rumors about her.”

“Yes.”

“You wouldn’t do something like that Erin…you were raised better than that.”

“Yes I was. I told her so. I also told her that whatever happens is going to happen. She did what she did and now the consequences are something that a lot of people have to live with. 

“I don’t care about Winsor or Karen, Daddy.” Erin shook her head. “I'm looking forward to so many things and they don’t have anything to do with it. It would be a lie to say I wasn’t hurt and that I'm not still hurt and angry. But I'm going to move on. I still have great friends, I have goals I want and need to reach, and I don’t have time to focus on small things.”

“What about David Rossi?” Erich asked.

“Well we've both been so busy lately but there are plans to get together soon. I don't know Daddy. I care about David and I think he cares about me. Sometimes I worry we might be going in different directions but I just think that’s the bad voices in my head talking. Right now I’ll just leave it at I don't know and try to stay positive.”

“He could be good for you, Erin.”

“Is that on the record?” she smiled.

“That’s on the record.” He nodded. “I admit to being slightly—very—uncomfortable about the idea. He’s three years older than you and from a different background. I worried about his brushes with the law and surely his life experiences. But being with him has been good for you. 

“You’re pushing more. You’re angry less. I'm not calling him a miracle worker and I'm not saying you wouldn’t have gotten there on your own. But if he makes you feel like seeing the changes in you makes me feel, I won't stand in your way. I will, however, keep my eagle eye on you. I’ll definitely keep it on him.”

“Thank you Daddy, for trusting me and letting me make this choice.”

“Absolutely.” Erich smiled and then leaned to kiss her cheek. “You probably need to get ready for bed.”

“I do.” Erin stood from the chair and put her forearm back into her crutch. She grabbed one more apple slice. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight sweetheart, I love you.”

“I love you too.”

***

“Oh my God, why do I feel like I've been in school for three months instead of three days?” Elizabeth asked. She rolled her eyes as she dug into her Kate Spade messenger bag and pulled out two cloves. She handed one to Erin. “And field hockey practice starts next Tuesday so I’ll have even less time and energy. Is that possible?” 

“I might be able to answer that if Trigonometry wasn’t my last class of the day.” Ursula said. “I definitely need to drop that class. I don’t need it to graduate and it'll fry my brain before Christmas break for sure. I just have too many other things on my schedule. I'm meeting up with the _Limelight_ girls this afternoon to get it up and running. I've got Amnesty International starting the week after next, _The Wheel_ , and the book club. Math has got to go.”

“I can't make it to the _Limelight_ meeting this afternoon.” Erin said. “But I’ll be there. Without fencing I really do want to put some more focus on writing features. My mother is so excited about it, as if I'm automatically going to become a journalist now. I'm not. But I might dust off my violin for orchestra too, as long as it doesn’t interfere too much with my therapy schedule.”

“I'm going to be Class 12 President.” Elizabeth said.

“Duh.” Ursula smirked as they all they got on the elevator. Erin was the only one with a pass because she couldn’t handle stairs right now. But it was the end of the day; they could get away with it. “I thought you were going to blow a gasket when you only won Vice President last year.”

“I wasn’t thrilled.”

“You're Tracy Flick.” Erin said laughing.

“That’s mean you bitches. There is absolutely nothing wrong with ambition. Tom is going to run for student government at York too. I'm going to help with his campaign. He only wants to be Vice President. I wanted to tell him to aim higher but it’s good for now. He can get his feet wet and then pounce when the time is right. We’re going for John Hoynes, without the resignation and the whores.”

“I'm really glad we’re friends.” Ursula said. “When you and Tom take over the world I want in on the ground floor.”

“I don't know, Ursula.” Elizabeth grinned as they walked off the elevator. “You have a bleeding heart for the causes and the masses.”

“You can be powerful and use it for good. You need me around to remind you not to become a dictator.”

“I really prefer Queen of the Known Universe.”

“Liddy,” Erin laughed. “You are crazy.”

They were laughing as they walked out of the building. It was just after three and there were students everywhere. Not to mention all the people just walking around the streets of the Upper East Side of Manhattan. Erin gasped when she saw him and her friends looked at her.

“Are you OK, Erin?” Ursula asked.

“It’s Dave.”

“Where?” Elizabeth looked around. She realized she’d never seen him before and the streets were as crowded as always. This was going to be her first look at the non-boyfriend boyfriend.

“Over there leaning on that Chevy Camaro.” Erin didn’t point but they followed her eyes.

“Oh my God, is that his car?” Elizabeth asked.

“I don’t know. He drives but I've never seen his car. The one time I was in the car with him it was his mom’s Durango.”

“Oh. Well let’s go and say hello.”

Dave could only smile when he saw the three girls coming toward him. He knew one of them had to be Ursula and that the other one wasn’t Karen. He couldn’t remember Erin’s other best friend’s name but he was sure that she would introduce him.

“Hey.” 

“What are you doing here?” she asked.

“I wanted to see where you went to school. I wanted to see you.” he looked at her friends. “I'm Dave Rossi.”

“I'm Ursula.” She extended her hand. “I've heard a lot of good things about you.”

“Same.” he shook her hand.

“I'm Elizabeth; it’s nice to meet you.” she shook his hand as well. “We hate to say hi and run but Ursula has meetings and I have to meet my boyfriend. Maybe we’ll see you around.”

“I look forward to it.” Dave smiled and nodded. “Bye.”

The girls said goodbye to Erin and started walking down the street together. Erin looked at Dave again. She wanted to say something but wasn’t sure what. He caught her off guard. It was a good thing; she was delighted to see him.

“You're smiling.” He said.

“I'm happy.”

“That’s good news.”

“I really want to hug you.” Erin said.

“What's stopping you?”

“It’s a little awkward with the crutches.”

“But not impossible?” he asked.

“Very little is impossible, David Rossi.”

Dave wrapped his arms around her neck, holding her close to him. Erin exhaled and wrapped her arms around his middle. Yes, it was a little weird with the crutches but she still did it. She did it, burying her face in his _Highway to Hell_ tee shirt. Dave stroked her hair. He didn’t want to let her go…their time apart had been hard for him. He hadn't been expecting it to be but it was.

“I'm just never gonna let go, OK?”

“I'm OK with that.” Erin smiled, looking up at him. When he kissed her she was breathless. Getting her second wind, Erin went in for another kiss.

“Are you sure?” Dave whispered, giving her Eskimo kisses.

“Oh yeah, it’s a dandy idea Rossi.”

“So you’ll say it?”

“You can say it.”

“Ladies first…it’s the gentlemanly thing to do.”

“You are not a gentleman. Well, you can be but I kinda like you rough around the edges.”

“And I kinda like every damn thing about you, even the stuff I don’t like.”

“That didn’t make a lot of sense.” Erin laughed.

“Yeah, you do that to me.” he kissed her again. “So you're my girl?”

“Yes. Now take me for coffee please, I've had a long day. There’s this great place a few blocks up where I sometimes go after school. It’ll probably be packed but I want a caramel coffee smoothie and to smoke this clove Liddy gave me. You don’t mind if I smoke this clove do you?”

“I’ll get over it. That kind of thing is bad for your health though.”

They had their arms around each other for just a little longer and then Dave let go. He didn’t like it but it would be impossible to function if they were stuck together all the time. It would be fun, surely, but not plausible.

“I know. But Liddy smuggled them in from Paris. I was showing a little appreciation. Have you ever had a caramel coffee smoothie?”

“No, I like my coffee like my women, hot and…that’s not going to come out like I planned it to.”

Erin laughed as they started walking down the street. She couldn’t skip but she sure felt like it. This moment was perfect, she had everything she wanted. She and Dave were going to be together. And it might not be for the rest of their lives but Erin knew they could be happy. 

They could be happy because they were real. He wasn’t Upper West Side “perfect” like Winsor was. And she surely wasn’t the girl he probably thought he would fall for either. But here they were, and they were going to make it work. 

“Your friend Ursula is cute.” Dave said. “I just wanted to put that out there from the beginning. I would never look at her like that, she’s your friend, and not my type exactly. But she’s cute. Not as cute as you, but still cute. I bet she has temper to spare doesn’t she? She looks like it.”

“She has her moments, yes. If you ever even glance at Ursula again, I'm poking your eye out. You’re devilishly handsome but it won't hold up with an eye patch.”

“You'd still want me, one eye or not.”

“Yeah…probably.” She laughed. “I'm stuck with you now anyway because you said it.”

“Actually I asked it and you answered it. But try to hold in your overwhelming enthusiasm, Strauss.” Dave said with a smirk.

“Oh you haven’t even seen me enthusiastic yet. Hold on David, this is going to be a wild and incredible ride.”

***


End file.
